Page 130 of Crimson Tears

Alexi seems to pick up on my thought process and starts moving back, bringing Evie with him.

I try to take Nessa’s hand, but she pulls it away and backs towards the truck.

“Why do we keep missing them? What are we doing wrong?” she screams.

Cillian has been quiet, almost as if he dissociated as soon as he realized this wasn’t going to be the rescue mission we were hoping for. Luckily, he snaps out of it when Nessa turns around and punches the truck.

We both grab her and nearly have to drag her back to the car as she tries to fight us. I do not understand why she is pulling away from me.

“What is going on?” I ask Cillian, trying to understand why Nessa is getting stuck in her head right now. “There has to be more to this.”

“This reminds her of her sister,” Cillian whispers to me, pulling Nessa into his chest as she tries to push away from him.

“She couldn’t save her in the end, so she doesn’t think we’ll get to them in time either.”

Nessa starts to hyperventilate, grabbing onto Cillian’s shirt. Evie has tears in her eyes as Alexi guides her towards their car. We need to get out of here and away from this truck.

“We need to go, Kid. This area is not secure.”

He looks from me to the vehicle, understanding what I mean. Without a word, he scoops Nessa into his arms and climbs into the backseat. I get in the front and head back to the safety of our home. Everything should be ready for us, and I have a feeling our girl is going to need a bubble bath and a lot of reassurance.

“What can we do, Love? Tell me.” Cillian’s voice is calm but firm, and I watch in the mirror as she shakes her head.

“We need to save them. We need to.” Sobs wrack her body as Cillian holds her closer. “I-I need to s-save them. I-I need to save h-her.”

And there it is.

Nessa seems to notice what she said, her body going stiff instead of shaking. “I mean… I…”

She blinks, but Cillian is there to cup her face and kiss her tears.

“We know, Sweetheart. We know.”

With their foreheads pressed together, she seems to take a breath. We all do.

The rest of the drive is solemn and quiet. Nessa looks out the window with a vacant expression, her body still in Cillian’s lap as he stares at me through the mirror. I get the sense he is trying to communicate something, but I cannot figure out what it is.

I know he is struggling too. Each of us needs to call Dr. K to figure out a way to cope. This cannot continue without change or we are all going to go insane.

When we arrive home, it is not the way I wanted them to see all of the completed renovations. So instead of taking the front entrance, I drive to the garage at the side of the inn directly connected to the house.

Cillian doesn’t release Nessa, keeping her firmly in his arms as he steps out. Surprisingly, she doesn't argue, still gripping onto his shirt as he carries her. In all the time I have known her, she has never seemed so fragile.

Nessa is the kind of woman who always stands back up after a fight, but right now she isn’t standing.

Cillian sits down on the edge of the bed, worry coating his features.

“What do we do, Old Man?” He needs an anchor as much as she does.

Nessa once said that when all feels lost to her, I always know what to do. So I follow my instincts just as I did when I knew she needed a hot bath and a neck massage.

“Distract her.” My firm command brokers no room for argument.

Their wide eyes fly to mine because in the past four months with us together, I have never really taken the dominant role. I enjoy going with the flow and figuring out what the two of them need from me in order to pull multiple orgasms out of our girl.

But that is not who either of them needs me to be right now, and I am craving some control in this situation. I may not have the power to save those kids at the moment, but I do have the authority to take charge here.

“Take off her clothes, Kid.”

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