Page 14 of A Wilder Wedding

“I wasn’t allowed to cook today, so the girls are doing it.”

“And we promise not to poison you,” Bethany called out, while Lark just laughed.

Maddie came forward, wine in hand, and I went towards her to help.

“Would you like me to pour?”

“Sure, while I explain what we’re having today.” She leaned over and kissed my cheek.

“It’s good to see you.”

“Seriously, good to see you,” Sidney said as she came around, more wine in her hand. Then she held up a bottle and showed it to all of us.

“This is our non-alcoholic wine. It is not a cider, but something we’re trying because we love our mocktails.”

“I’m in. All the way in,” Alexis said as she clapped her hands.

“It’s going to be a long process before we get to the point that we can go on a mass scale, but much like Roy is trying the non-alcoholic beers, and doing really well with them, we’re going to try non-alcoholic wines.”

“The non-alcoholic gin I tried before was really good,” I said as I held out my wine glass.

“Wyatt is having fun with that.”

“There’s also a mezcal and a bourbon that a few friends are making. I love the fact that if we just want the pretty drinks without all the alcohol side-effects, we can have them.”

As Maddie explained the wine we had in our glasses, a beautiful Riesling that I knew would taste amazing, I looked around the room at these women and knew it would break me when I had to leave.

It was time for me to grow, to find something new. I knew that. I felt like I was running in place and had been for a while. Only I didn’t want to leave.

I would have to fix this. To change.

Even if I didn’t want to at all.

We clinked glasses again, then I took a sip of the crisp pear-like taste of the Riesling. I went back to my beanbag, which thankfully had a structured back so I wasn’t leaning too far back, and listened as everyone spoke. I had goat cheese on toasted rounds, and mini quiches that Lark and Bethany had made. They were amazing, but I wasn’t going to tell Kendall that.

“I see that look on your faces and these are fantastic. You can work in my kitchen anytime,” Kendall said with a laugh, and I relaxed.

Kendall was not a hothead despite what other people thought, but she was very particular about her food. With good reason.

“Oh thank God,” Bethany said as she wiped fake sweat from her brow. “If these didn’t work, we were either going to have to raid your kitchen or order takeout.”

“Not in this house,” Kendall said with a laugh. I ate another bite and hung out with my friends.

“So, how are you feeling, Alexis?” Aurora asked. Alexis had been under the weather for the past few days and was a workaholic like the rest of us. The other woman took a seat next to me in the other beanbag chair. I rested my head on her shoulder, enjoying this time. Was I really going to leave this? No. I didn’t have a plan yet. I was just stuck in my head, I would be fine. I had been fine all these years, hadn’t I?

And perhaps that was the answer to my own question.

“A little tired. But Eli isn’t letting me work any extra hours.”

“Damn straight you’re not,” Lark said, her eyes narrowed.

“I’m fine. Really. You’re the one who was sick all last week.” Alexis gave her a pointed look and I held back a grin.

Lark blushed. “It wasn’tthat. Though we’re not exactly trying, but we’re notnottrying.”

Everybody cheered as I tried to do the grammar math in my head, laughing into my wine. At that moment I realized maybe I’d had too much and I set the glass down, annoyed with myself.

I wasn’t going to leave these people. They were my friends. My family. My real family sucked.

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