Page 50 of Inked Craving

“Why am I so nervous?” I asked as I rocked Emery in my arms. She looked so cute in her dove-gray onesie with her little bow mouth puckered. She smiled up at me, or at least I thought it was a smile. It was probably gas. Could babies smile at a month old? I wasn’t sure anymore since all the baby books had blended into my mind at this point, and all I could think about was the fact that Colton was on his way to the house.

“I don’t know why youwouldn’tbe nervous,” Archer said as he leaned forward and ran the back of his knuckle along Emery’s cheek. “This is the first time Colton is seeing her in person. After such a weird-ass year, I would be a little freaked out, too.”

“That somehow helped me. I don’t know if it was supposed to help me, but it did.”

My brother smiled at me, then leaned forward and kissed my forehead. “You’re going to be fine. It’s hard not to fall in love with this little pumpkin right here.” He grinned down at my daughter, and I held back a happy sigh.

“She is pretty amazing. Perfect in every way.”

“Oh, good, you’ve caught the same bug that Annabelle and Brenna got with their kids.”

I knew he was teasing, but I wanted to nip that argument in the bud since my sisters and I were all on the same page. “I know that she’s not perfect, and nobody ever will be since perfection doesn’t exist. Trying to attain that only leads to stress. However, right now, looking this cute? That’s my idea of perfection.”

“Good answer, Mom,” Archer teased. “Do you want me to be here?”

“No, I need to do this alone. Although Tarryn will be here, too,” I gritted out.

“Dear God, that’s right. She’s Emery’s stepmom.” Archer’s eyes widened. “Why didn’t I put that together?”

“I find it hard to wrap my mind around, too. This woman, however nice she may seem through video calls, is somehow connected to my daughter. But I can’t be selfish. This will be good for Emery. The more people who love her and take care of her and want to be purposeful and important parts of her life, the better.”

“That’s a very healthy way to think about it. I’m proud of you.”

“I also want to scratch the woman’s eyes out, but I feel like that’s on me.”

Archer snorted and then hugged me tightly. “I’m going to head out before they get here. But I’m only a phone call away if you need me. As is Lee.”

I heard the tone in my brother’s voice and did my best to ignore it. “He has an important presentation today. I don’t want to bug him.”

“Youshouldbug him. He’s your boyfriend. And Emery is very important to him. You know the only reason he isn’t here is that you practically pushed him out of the house.”

“I did what I had to do to make sure he didn’t get in the middle of it. Because I don’t want him to feel like he needs to hurt Colton for merely existing.”

“Existing and not existing close enough to be a father,” Archer grumbled.

“I’m trying to be a better person. Let that happen.”

“Whatever you say.” Archer kissed my cheek again and then headed out after saying sweet goodbyes to Emery.

That left me alone in my living room, holding Emery close and wondering if I was doing the right thing.

Colton hadn’t been able to make it out to Colorado because of work, and he hated it. I hated it, too. Because while part of me had loved Colton, the other part couldn’t be allowed to resent him for not being here. That would somehow hurt Emery, and I didn’t want that to happen. He had given me Emery. I couldn’t hate him for that. Only I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do now.

Because the one person I wanted to be here, the guy I wanted to be a part of this, couldn’t be. At least not today. Because I couldn’t let Lee be in the same room with Colton without Lee probably punching the other man. I knew Lee that well. Hell, I loved him.

I wasn’t supposed to love him. He was only supposed to be my friend through all of this, yet somehow, we had become something more to each other, and I was so afraid that I would rely on that so much that he would leave.

After all, Colton had left.

I frowned and pushed those thoughts from my mind, focusing on Emery in my arms.

“Okay, baby girl. Time to meet your daddy.”

The words felt foreign on my tongue. Somehow, part of me pictured Lee in that role, and he practicallyhadbeen. He had been there when Emery was born. Had changed more diapers than anyone else in my family other than me, and had held Emery when she got fussy. Emery fell asleep in his arms more than she did in mine, and I couldn’t be jealous of that. Because Emery loved Lee just like Lee loved my baby girl.

Now, she would be meeting the other man in her life.

I just had to hope today would go okay.

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