Page 16 of Inked Persuasion

“I’m sorry.”

“For what? You’re supposed to be good with words. And I know that people who say they’re sorry but don’t say what they’re sorry about only want to get through the apology quicker. So, you should tell me exactly what you mean.”

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for what I thought before. How I treated you. And how I’m treating you now. I’m finally listening to what you said, and what my parents said all along.” He pulled his hands out of his pockets, then ran one over his face. “I miss him so fucking much, Annabelle.”

A little part of me broke, and I swallowed the lump in my throat. “I miss him, too, Jacob. The two of us continuing to fight won’t bring him back, though.”

“I know,” he said, dropping his hand. “I felt like I was losing him before he was even gone when we were younger. And I know now that he was just scared. But I needed someone to blame, and everyone else blamed God, so I blamed you.”

I wiped a tear from my face, annoyed that I was even crying. “I blamed God for a while, too. Then I blamed the doctors and fate. And then myself for not finding a way to cure him when I was eighteen and had no idea what I was doing.”

Jacob’s eyes widened. “Seriously?”

“Of course. It’s all stages. But the thing was, I never blamed you for walking away. For looking at me the way you did because I thought you were hurting.”

He pressed his lips together and gave me a tight nod. “You were the easiest scapegoat. And I saw what was happening and took that twisted narrative and made it true, rather than leaving it as the fiction it was.”

“I hated every minute of the charade. The press. I had to put on the fake smiles because the world needed to see we were brave, and that I wasn’t dying inside. But we raised so much money for research. And there have been a few breakthroughs since. Small ones, but it’s something.”

“I know,” he whispered. “I keep up on it. And a percentage of my income goes to it. That and research for ALS.”

I pressed my lips together, trying to keep my composure. “I’m so sorry about Kelley. I love her so much. It’s not fair that she’s sick.”

“It’s not fair what’s happened to my family at all. But you’ve always been here, and I never knew. It’s like my parents decided to make sure that I never knew how much you took care of them. How wonderful you are to them.”

“I think they remembered how you felt about me and didn’t want to make things more awkward.”

“Until I needed to move back because my mom was running out of time. And she’s right. There isn’t enough time in the world for me to continue hating you. Especially when you don’t deserve it.”

I let out a breath, shaking my head. “That’s the oddest apology I’ve ever heard.”

“It was the strangest reason to hate someone I’ve ever heard,” Jacob grumbled. “It’s going to take me a while to untwist the narrative I created in my head. But I’m telling you now, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for what I said, and for what I thought. I’ll figure out how to deal with this.”

“We live next door to each other, Jacob. And I’m not leaving your parents’ lives. Especially now. We’re going to see each other often. Can you handle that?”

He gave me a tight nod. “I think it’s time I figure out exactly who Annabelle Montgomery is.”

I shook my head. “I’m the same person I always was.”

“Now that’s a lie,” Jacob corrected. “And I think that maybe we should get to know the people we are now, rather than dwelling on the people we left behind in the shadows.”

I looked at him then, wondering what I felt. Was it warmth? I didn’t know. But I wanted to reach out and hold him, tell him that everything would be all right, even though that was a lie. I didn’t like that I noticed how his eyes darkened, the way his lips parted. I didn’t like that we were buried in memories of a time gone by and mired in loss and fractured silences. And yet all I could do was look at him and wonder who this man was. WhowasJacob Queen?

Betrayal slid over me then, and I knew it made no sense. It wasn’t as if Jonah and I had genuinely been in love. Not like that. And yet, this was Jacob. I shouldn’t feel anything. Especially not right now.

Still, I had to say the words. “I would like to get to know you,” I whispered.

He studied my face for a long moment before he finally spoke. “Good. Because I think we should. Mom and Dad love you so much. I’d like to get to know that woman. And I don’t want you to carry the burden of my family alone any longer.”

I shook my head. “You were always there. Even if you weren’t in the same room.”

“Maybe, but I’m here full-time now. Let’s help them together if you want to. Or you can step away so you can breathe. You don’t have to bear any responsibility.”

I shook my head. “I will always be a part of their lives, of our old life, who we were. And that means I’m going to be a traveler on this road your family takes. So, I guess we’re in this together.”

“Then I suppose I should start with this.” He held out his hand. “Hello, I’m Jacob Queen. Permanent asshole and perpetual insomniac workaholic.”

My lips twitched. “Hello,” I said, sliding my hand into his, ignoring the heat between us. “I’m Annabelle Montgomery. Also a workaholic, a slight insomniac, and someone who loves her family very much.”