Page 79 of Shameless With Him

I flinched, taking a step back. “Don’t say things like that.”

“Why? It’s clearly running through your head. That’s why you’re being a dick to me and to everyone else. That’s why you pretty much broke Zoey’s heart. And don’t lie and say you didn’t. I know you did.”

“I don’t have anything to say,” I said, taking a step back. My vision started to double, and bile filled my throat. My head pulsated, and I bent over, throwing up.

“Oh, fuck,” Tucker said, and everyone started to move at once.

My body shook, and I dropped to my knees, my head pounding.

It hadn’t come on this fast before. I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t focus.

The last thought I had was about Zoey, and I hated that I was going to ruin her sister’s wedding. Just like I ruined everything else.

I woke up soon after,but they still called an ambulance for me.

Thankfully, though, we hadn’t disrupted the wedding since my brothers had been smart and called for the ambulance a little down the road. They’d dragged me that way since I hadn’t been able to walk. Nobody from the wedding really knew what had happened. They were still partying and carrying on, at least that’s what Dimitri said as he texted his wife.

I was grateful for that because I’d already ruined the day for Zoey, I didn’t want to do it for everybody else.

We ended up in the emergency room, and they hooked me up to an IV for fluids, even though I really just wanted to go home. They took tests, and I waited. And kept waiting. All I wanted to do was throw up again.

“When’s the last time you ate?” one of the nurses asked.

I frowned. “I don’t know, yesterday or something? My head’s been hurting.”

“You’re dehydrated, and your blood sugar’s really low. I know it sucks to eat when you have a migraine, but you need to take care of yourself. Don’t worry, we’ll get you some fluids and some nutrients. The doctor will be here soon to talk to you about everything. We’ll get you settled.”

She checked all of my vitals and then walked out, leaving me alone in my little ER room with my brothers and sister. Tucker paced outside in the waiting room, apparently having wanted to allow the Carrs privacy. Thea and Erin were also in the waiting room, Thea with her feet up since the pregnancy made her feet swell.

Apparently, one of the bridesmaids, Marni, John’s sister, was also here in the hospital, only she was in the maternity ward.

It was a big day for hospital visits.

Hell.

“Why didn’t you eat?” Dimitri asked, not looking at me as he spoke.

“I felt like crap. I didn’t mean to forget.”

“You need to take better care of yourself,” Amelia said, her hands folded over her stomach.

Devin wrapped his arm around her shoulders and kissed the top of her head. “We all need to make sure we watch out for each other. This doesn’t get to happen again.”

“Well, what if it does? What if it’s a neurological disease or a tumor they couldn’t find in the first tests? We’ve been waiting how long? And I still don’t have any answers.”

“Then we’ll do this together.”

I looked at my sister as she spoke and sighed. “I’ve been doing just fine on my own,” I mumbled.

“That’s bullshit,” Dimitri said. I turned my gaze towards him. “Complete bullshit. You came to us, you asked for help, and now you’re pushing us away? I get that you’re hurting, and you fucked up with Zoey, but you’re going to have to find a way to make this right. We’re going to find out whatever the fuck is wrong with you and make it better. Because Carrs don’t back down. And you don’t get to be sick anymore.”

If I didn’t feel like shit, I would have smiled just then. Dimitri would find a way to fix everything, even if some things weren’t fixable. I leaned back against the pillow and let them mumble to each other as I tried to focus.

Making sure things didn’t get serious with Zoey had been a mistake.

I had known that even as I was doing it, but I couldn’t go back now. And I didn’t deserve her forgiveness if I ever got a chance to say that I was sorry. I would just have to live with my regrets, even if I didn’t know what was going to come next.

“Mr. Carr?” an unfamiliar voice said, and I opened my eyes to see a doctor in a white coat, a frown on his face.

---