Page 77 of Shameless With Him

Chapter 16

Caleb

I didn’t glower,I didn’t scowl. I didn’t fucking smile. I was such a loser. I had known the minute I texted Christy to see if she wanted to come with me to the wedding as a show of support rather than an actual date that it had been a mistake. But I hadn’t been able to think of anything else to do.

Could I have actually talked to Zoey? Sure. But I didn’t have my head on straight, and that was fucking clear.

So, now, I stood for the wedding photos, standing by John as the other man looked at me, knowing something was wrong, but he wasn’t going to ask.

And I wasn’t going to fucking answer, either. Because I was not going to ruin this for my friend.

John and Lacey deserved for this day to be fucking perfect. And that meant I needed to leave soon.

The wedding had been beautiful, not that I’d really noticed because I’d been trying not to look at Zoey, who looked as if I had broken part of her.

And, fuck, I had.

She loved me. Jesus Christ.

She couldn’t love me. I was such an idiot. I didn’t deserve anything she gave me. I deserved to go to hell, to get my ass beat, and be left for dead. I knew I would hurt her, but I hadn’t known it would be like this.

I hadn’t known she would hate me.

Or maybe that’s exactly what I wanted.

Because if she hated me, I wouldn’t have to make a fucking decision. In the past, I’d always been the man who treated women like royalty, even if I never stayed, but that wasn’t me right then.

No, not even a little bit.

Damn it.

“You doing okay?” one of the groomsmen asked. I nodded, smiling brightly, even though I knew it didn’t reach my fucking eyes.

“Yeah, long day. But good wedding.”

“So, you came here with Zoey, right?” the guy asked.

I shook my head. “No, I didn’t.” Because I made mistakes and couldn’t fix them.

The guy’s brows lifted. “Oh, so you’re not with her?”

That was the question for the ages. But considering what I had done and what she’d said, I knew the answer now. And though it had been my goal, the taste of regret was bitter on my tongue.

“No, I’m not.”

“So, you wouldn’t mind if I asked her to dance?”

I had my hands on the guy’s lapels before I even thought about it, and then Dimitri was on me, pulling me back.

“Caleb. What the fuck?”

The groomsman sputtered. “Sorry, man. He said she was single, but guess I was wrong. I meant nothing. You and Zoey, you guys are great. I’m just going to go. Sorry about that.”

“You going to tell me what the fuck that was about?” Dimitri asked as he tugged me towards the other end of the barn. There was no one around, and we were outside so no one could hear us, but hell, I just wanted to go fucking home. My head hurt, I needed to throw up again, and I was still waiting on my damn doctor to give me the damn results.

“I’m fine.”

“Don’t lie to me. That’s one thing we don’t do. We don’t lie. Mom and Dad lied enough for both of us. You know that.”

---