Page 36 of Whiskey Reveals

Chapter 17

By the timethe police came and left, Melody was frozen to the bone and Fox was stiff with anger beside her. She’d told the detectives about the email and the letter, as well as the flowers, and now this. When they pulled Fox away so she could tell the police in more detail why this could be happening in a new town, she’d told them the truth, and explained what had happened before she moved to Whiskey. She even gave them a list of who it could be, but for all she knew, it was someone totally different yet still connected to the time that had changed her life forever.

There hadn’t been judgment in their eyes, but she could still feel it in her soul. When they left, taking the shoe with them, she hadn’t wanted to stay at the studio any longer. She would come back since it was another part of her home, but that night, it felt tainted.

And when she found herself standing in front of her studio next to Fox, she wrapped her arms around her middle, waiting for what he would stay. Instead of asking her what was going on, he pulled her into his arms, and she sank into him, her body shaking.

“Let’s get you to my place,” he whispered softly. “The town’s small, and they’re going to wonder why the police were here. They won’t know the details though, so let’s call your grandma and make sure she knows. But I still want you with me. Can you do that? Can you give me tonight?”

She nodded, wiping away a tear that had broken through her control. “I can do that. I was planning on talking to you more tonight anyway.”

His jaw tightened, and he gave her a nod. “Let’s do it then.”

She called her grandmother as he drove her to his place. She’d walked to her studio that morning since everything was in the building and she’d needed the air to calm down, but she was happy that he had his car just then.

When they were inside his house, each holding a cup of hot tea in their hands, she sat next to him on the couch and tried to figure out where and how to start.

“I want you safe, Melody. You don’t need to tell me every secret, but I want to know why someone left a bloody ballet shoe behind your place, and why you had those flowers. I remember those even though you said they were nothing.”

She set down her mug and faced him. “I was a ballet dancer. Though I guess you probably already knew that about me.”

He set his cup down next to hers on the worn table before taking her hand and giving it a squeeze. He didn’t say anything, just let her talk, and for that she was grateful.

“I had a natural talent. My mother did, too, just like Grandma Pearl. But while Grandma Pearl went to Vegas to be a showgirl as you know, my mother wanted to do something…classier.” Melody rolled her eyes, remembering the fights the two women had gotten into over the years, their verbal sparring filled with love and sometimes a bit of bitterness that always coated her tongue. “So she went into ballet, but while she was a fantastic dancer, at least according to her, she didn’t have what was needed to attend Juilliard, the height of her ambitions before going to dance for a company. So when she found herself with a little girl who loved to twirl, she put all of her energy into my dancing. Everything she had. And my father let her. He pushed me, as well, but it was different for him because he was the one who paid for things while Mom was the one who told me I had to be a dancer. If I didn’t love dancing so much, I don’t know what would have happened. But what did happen was that I let my stern parents who put their whole lives into shaping mine, and who told me over and over again that I had talent I couldn’t waste…well, I let them turn me into someone I hated. Only I didn’t hate that person at the time. I was the mean girl. The dancer who thought she was top shit, and no one could bring me down. Along with four of my friends—two girls, two boys—the five of us ruled the dancing world in our community and then at Juilliard.”

Melody licked her lips, but when she considered stopping, Fox gave her hand another squeeze, and she was able to speak again.

“I wasn’t a good person. I looked down on anyone in my way and below me. I thought that I could do no wrong. And one night before we were all set to leave school and go into our companies to rule the world, all five of us had far too much to drink. We were drunk, stupid, and because we thought no one and nothing could touch us, we drove.”

She closed her eyes, the memories of what happened next slamming into her.

“I wasn’t driving. I was in the back seat. Freddie was driving because he drove the best while drinking. The fact we even thought that makes me hate myself even more. Jake was in the passenger seat. Candice was to the right of me. And Sarah to the left.”

“Oh, baby.”

“You know what I said when we got into the car? I said, ‘Oh, it’s fine. We’re not that drunk. We’re fucking Juilliard dancers. Nothing can touch us right now.’” This time, tears fell, but she didn’t brush them away, she deserved the shame.

“Freddie took a turn too quickly, and we rolled four times, hitting a pole. Freddie, Jake, and Candice died on impact. Sarah broke both her legs, a few ribs, and cracked her skull open.” Melody let out a shaky breath. “I had a severe concussion, broke my wrist, and shattered my knee. Sarah’s career was over. My career was over. And three of my best friends were dead because we thought we were better than everyone else and didn’t have to follow the rules.”

“Jesus Christ.” Fox moved to wrap his arms around her, but she pulled away, shaking her head.

“Sarah never forgave me, and I don’t blame her. Yes, she was drunk, too, but I ended up with the least scars. And I had been the one to say the words. The others’ parents, families, and coaches put all of their blame on the two of us, and I left the area as soon as I could. There were no formal charges since we were legal drinking age, barely, and neither of us was driving, but I know what we deserved. I wasn’t driving, but I let it happen because of my bad decisions. The choices I made helped kill three people and almost killed two more. And we could have killed countless others with our recklessness.”

“Melody, yes, you made the wrong choice, but you can’t blame only yourself.”

“You can say that, but I’m still going to. I can’t help it. No amount of therapy and time will ever take that away. My parents practically disowned me once I was not only broken goods but also a stain on our family legacy. Mom died of cancer two years later, and Dad ended up dying of a heart attack far too young the year after that. I moved around for years, trying to figure out who I was while finding out if I could be the person I needed to be once I found a place to settle down to form roots. I’d thought Whiskey was that place. Hell, I thought maybe this whole baby thing was a way I could find roots with you.” She hadn’t meant to be that honest, but she was already baring the worst of her soul, she might as well come clean entirely. “Grandma Pearl doesn’t look at me any differently for what I did, and I hope you don’t either, but no matter what, I know that I’ll have this child and always wonder what might have happened if my friends had been able to have children of their own. That will never go away. I need you to know why being with me could be a mistake.”

Fox reached out and pulled her into his lap, his arms tight bands of steel that refused to let go. And because he kissed her softly, holding her as she let the tears fall once again, she let him cradle her, let him care for her, even if she felt as though she didn’t deserve it.

“You’re not a fucking mistake. You made one, yes, and you paid for it. And if whoever is threatening you is part of that, then you’re still paying for that mistake. But we’ll fix it. We can’t bring them back, can’t make it so you never get in that car, but we can make whoever is coming after you stop. I won’t let you get hurt again. We all have parts of us who we aren’t anymore. We’ve shed those past lives even within the few short years we get. I don’t see the mean girl you spoke of. I see a woman who worked her ass off for her studio and didn’t let a little thing like pregnancy derail her. You’re working your ass off, and I’m so proud of you. I just wish you didn’t have to go through that in order to find the woman you’ve become. And I’m not letting you go, Melody. Not now, and maybe not ever. I know we said no promises, but I think we’re past that. Now let me hold you, and then we can figure out the next steps, but for now, just let me hold you.”

So she let him hold her, let him try to soothe what she thought might never be fully comforted. And while she could fall into him in that moment, she knew she still had to be careful. Because he might know the facts, but time could change everything.

And she’d already lost everything once because of her wrong choices.

She couldn’t lose it again.

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