Page 56 of Off the Clock

“The way I see it, we’d be an open secret. Like people close to us would know?—”

Caleb cut me off with a loud snort. “This isn’t some 1950s period drama. I’m not here to be confirmed bachelors with anyone or jump through hoops to deny who I am or who I’m with.”

“So, what? We end things regardless of working together? Because I don’t like that idea at all.”

“Me either.” Caleb’s tone had taken on a weary, long-suffering tone I flat-out hated. “Last I knew, you didn’t like relationships at all, and maybe that’s why you can stomach staying closeted. It’s no biggie to you, but for me, I promised myself once I was free of my bullies that I would never again make myself smaller to fit in.”

“I just don’t want to rock the boat in terms of the football community.” I held up my hands.

“Then don’t, but leave me out of it.” He swung back over to the driver’s seat in a surprisingly fluid motion. “I understand. You don’t want the scrutiny of being an openly bisexual coach in a macho sport. I don’t have to like it, but I understand that’s not the easiest of roads.”

“Then why not?—”

He cut me off by turning on the truck. “Look, if you want to be together, openly, honestly, then let’s find a way, but your big idea isn’t it. Not for me.”

“I get it.” I exhaled hard, hand moving to the door handle. “You deserve a public relationship.”

“The sad thing is that so do you, but you can’t see it. You hid such a huge part of yourself for so many years. I’m not sure you really comprehend what you’re willing to give up.”

“I don’t want to lose you.” It was my last, desperate appeal. “That’s the thing I don’t want to give up.”

“Tony—” Caleb reached for my arm, but as soon as he touched my biceps, his phone shrieked from the console.

“Fucking timing.” He glanced at the incoming message. “Someone had to call out with food poisoning. The station needs me to cover a shift. Sorry, but I have to go.”

“No, I’m the one who’s sorry.” I leaned in to give him one—and I refused to call it last—kiss. “This isn’t how either of uswants to end things. Give me a chance to think. Don’t give up on us yet.”

“I’m not sure I could truly give up on you even if I tried.” Caleb groaned. “But I really do have to go. We’ll talk soon.”

Soon.I’d have to cling to that and hope to God I found some clarity and fast.

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Tony

I’d reached the point in missing Caleb where my brain and heart hurt too much to keep mulling over ways to keep us together. Consequently, I was scrubbing Eric’s kitchen like an army medal might be on the line. The more I cleaned, the less I had to think.

“You don’t have to do the whole kitchen on your own.” Maren, who was in town for one last visit before the college semester started, wandered into the kitchen and immediately started putting away pots from the drying rack.

“I like it.” I protested more because I was in the mood to be alone with my funk than out of a genuine love of cleaning.

“No one likes dish duty.” Naturally, Maren saw right through me. She moved from the pots to lining up knives in their wooden block on the counter. She always managed to sound far wiser than her years, an eldest kid trait I knew well. “It’s why everyone else ducked out after dinner.”

“Yeah, but Wren cooked, so they had an excuse. Rowan left to meet some kids at the ice cream place, and John has friends over.”

“And you and Jonas are pushovers.” Maren rolled her eyes. She’d missed dinner, or she certainly would have wrangled the other kids into helping clean up.

“Maybe.” I had to admit I wasn’t nearly as good at getting the kids to help as Sean or Eric, who both had that innate dad energy. “Jonas got called in for a shift at the hospital while we were eating, or I’m sure he would have insisted on helping.”

“Ugh.” Maren released a pained groan. “I was hoping he was still here. I need to talk something out.”

“Wanna try talking to me instead?” I wasn’t sure I was fit company for anyone right then, but I couldn’t walk away from Maren in obvious distress. “You’ve been in a huff your whole visit. Worried about going back and the start of the school year?”

“Sort of.” Her bow-shaped mouth twisted. Like Rowan, she was tall and thin with dark hair and elfin features. “Mainly, I’m worried about Diesel because Stephanie broke up with him.”

“Isn’t he still in the hospital?” Last I’d heard, Diesel was facing a lengthy recovery from his hiking accident. He’d had a few infection setbacks before finally being transferred to a medical rehab facility back here in Mount Hope to work on regaining mobility.

“Exactly.” Maren made a disgusted noise. “He’s still not back home with his dad, and Stephanie pulls this crap? And yeah, Diesel is annoying, but no one deserves to be broken up with simply because they got hurt and their injuries are quote-unquote ‘gross.’”

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