Page 13 of The Five Stages of Courting Dalisay Ramos

“In the Philippines it’s all about modesty. You can’t show your affection outright. Doing so would be disrespectful.”

“But what about work?”

Dalisay considers it for a moment. “Fine. We can talk at work. Overnight is a neutral zone. Sound good? You still have a chance to back out.”

Evan lets out a huff of a laugh. “You underestimate me, Ms. Ramos. You really think the Five Stages are that hard?”

“Don’t get cocky. Not everyone has what it takes.” She looks him over, as if gauging whether he’s worthy or not, and meets him in the eye again, smirking as if she’s seen everything she needs to.

“Believe it or not, I’m no quitter,” he says. “When I commit to something, I go all-in.”

“I’d like to see that for myself.”

Evan’s heart jackhammers in his rib cage. Seeing this competitive glint in her eye is making him feel like he’s touching a live wire. It’s no secret he’s been eyeing that trip. It would be a dream come true, and here she is, offering it up on a silver platter. How can he turn it down? He’ll take whatever she throws his way. How hard can it be? JM said it was like thetwelve steps but way harder, but Evan highly doubts that. It’s a courtship ritual, not theHunger Games.

“Okay, I’ll do it,” he says, and holds out his hand. She shakes it, her grip firm and sure. “I’ll send you tons of photos frommytrip.”

Dalisay’s smile is sweet, but her eyes are sharp. She doesn’t let go of his hand. “Whole-ass, Mr. Saatchi.” His words tossed back at him bring a slight blush to his cheeks.

When he leaves, he can feel her eyes on him as goes back to his desk. And when he sits down, the ghost of their first touch still lingers on his skin.

Evan’s at the dog park with Tallulah after work when his phone buzzes in his pocket. It’s Pinky.

The second he hits the green button to answer, he has to hold the phone at arm’s length, Pinky’s scream is so loud. “EVAAAAN! You’re doing the Five Stages!”

Some of the other dog-parents glance his way, no doubt hearing Pinky’s voice carrying from the phone. Once Pinky’s done screaming, he puts the phone back to his ear. “Let me guess … Riggs.”

“He told me everything!”

After Evan shook hands with Dalisay, of course he told Riggs, who of course told JM and Pinky. Nothing stays secret for long in their friendship circle. “Yeah, well, don’t get your hopes up. It’s to prove a point. Dalisay and I have an agreement.”

“It doesn’t matter! I can’t believe she’s giving you another chance! This is going to be so much fun.”

Evan smiles. He’s not sure this counts as a second chance, especially when that’s not what this is about at all, but Pinky’s excitement is a little infectious. “Sure, fun. So, what, are you calling just to scream in my ear just because or—?”

“I’m going to help you, dummy. Teasing of Friends, remember?”

“Right,” he says. “Figures that ‘friends’ would be involved in the ‘teasing’ part.” While he’s on the phone, Tallulah comes over, tail wagging, to check on him and he bends down to give her a scratch on the head before she bounds off again to chase a chihuahua, yapping happily. Easily, he has the cutest dog in the park. He’ll be taking no questions. “What’s the plan then?”

“Turns out my mom does know Dalisay’s family, which is great, because she’s going to invite them to my cousin’s birthday party this weekend. It’ll be the perfect chance for all of us to hang out and talk you two up.”

“When? Where?”

“Saturday, Fil-Am Community Center, two o’clock.”

“Okay, I’ll be there.” Pinky cheers, making him hold the phone away from his ear again. “Just remember,” he adds, “it’s not real. Don’t get your hopes up about this turning into anything.”

“I don’t care! I love doing the first stage! It’s one of my favorite things.”

Pinky has several favorite things: cosplay, board games, donuts with jelly on the inside, and—of course—JM, but Evan has no doubt that setting her friends up on dates is high up on that list too. He can’t help but smile.

“When you said it was a birthday, I assumed there would be …,” Evan says, trailing off.

“Fewer clowns?” JM offers.

Pinky and JM stand on either side of Evan like bodyguards, as chaos reigns around them.

Pinky’s nephew, Angel, just turned five. It’s an educated guess, what with all the number fives decorating the room in sparkly banners and shaped balloons and the tiered cake with a number five–shaped candle. But for a kid named Angel, perhaps he really is the devil. What child actually wants to be around a bunch of Bozos of their own free will?

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