But by the look on his face, I think that he is feeling the same way, or at least wanting to do a lot more to me. Nervously gnawing on my bottom lip, I watch him, worrying about what is going to happen if he ends up touching me.
Will it even be okay?
I don’t know but I’m tempted to find out.
“Is that the only reason you became a Rogue?” I ask him, feeling a little curious and not ready for bed, “It seems a little ridiculous that they would do that to you when you hadn’t really done anything.”
He sighed, shaking his head, “Honestly, it was going to happen no matter what I did. Even if I attempted to do the right thing, I’m almost certain that it would have blown up in my face no matter what I did. I guess you can say that I couldn't bring myself to care so much.”
A part of me is curious about what else to say about it because I couldn’t be sure it would be alright, “but why? It seems like a ridiculous reason to just toss you out or to label you as a Rogue. That stuff follows you, doesn’t it?”
He nods his head, “It does but I don’t let it get to me. If I do, then it is just going to ruin my life even more and I’m not interested in letting them win. I’m sure you can understand that.”
I couldn’t be sure what else to say because it was quite clear that he was only thinking about going to bed now. I would love nothing more than to do the right thing and not care about anything else but I did know that I was going to make it alright.
And when I think about the future, maybe having Oakley by my side is definitely going to be the right call.
I think that if I end up pushing him away, then I'm going to regret it and I don’t want to be filled with regrets. I just want to know someday if he ends up feeling the same way about me as I feel about him.
“Do you truthfully think that this is going to work out?” I ask him curiously, licking my bottom lip, “I don’t know what I want to do but I do know that I’m going to make sure it is going to be alright. I don’t care if Dad never approves of it.”
Oakley just smiles and shakes his head, “truthfully, I think that he is probably more concerned about keeping you safe. I don’t blame him because I know that I wouldn’t want anything to happen to you either.”
A part of me wanted to know precisely what he meant by that but I also knew that it was going to be alright. I wasn’t going tolet anything else stand in the way of my future and I think that Oakley is feeling the same way.
Maybe he wouldn’t want me, I don’t know.
But what I do know is that I’m never going to stop the way that I feel.
Because losing him is something that I would regret more than anything else.
Chapter Five
Oakley
Waking up with her in my arms is the most perfect feeling that I could have ever felt, seeing how she is cuddled up against me and making me feel perfect. I couldn’t be sure what I was going to do, a feeling that I have never felt before.
All I could think about is how much I wanted her and everything that I’m going to do to her the minute that I fully made her mine. When I saw how she was looking at me, this heat in her gaze that sent a shiver down my spine, I couldn’t be sure what was going to happen.
But I did know that she is just too perfect and I’m never going to be able to stop the way that I’m feeling. Something tells me that she must be feeling the same way about me because there is no way that she doesn’t.
Lightly brushing my lips against her forehead, I keep her close to me, pulling her further in. She stirs a little bit but doesn’t wake up, a low groan passing through her lips as she watches me. I wasn’t sure what was going to happen when she woke up and realized that I was holding her.
But I love it and I knew that I wasn’t going to be able to stop it. If it happened, I feel like I would regret more and I didn’t want to regret being with her.
I just wanted to care about her and make sure that she was content and happy. If I lost her, I was almost certain that it would ruin everything else and I couldn’t let that happen.
But if they were to find me in bed with her, I’m certain that they would have flipped out or done something worse. Maybe there is a reason that I’m here with her but I couldn’t be sure how well it would go.
I already know that the King is not interested in me being mates with Rowena. I’m certain that he doesn’t think that I’m good enough for her but I can promise him that I really don’t care. When it comes to fated mates, it doesn’t matter.
Once you are there, you are never going to be able to let them go. I just wish that he would have already realized this before it was too late. Now he is going to have to learn that I’m not interested in playing these dumb games with him.
When it comes to Rowena’s safety, I already know that I don’t care.I’m more content with making sure that nobody is going to hurt her and if they try, then they will be dealt with accordingly. I don’t think that he has figured this out yet.
Sighing softly, I turn away and let her go, hoping that she doesn’t realize that I have a boner. If she did realize that, then I would have honestly been a little embarrassed and I’m not even sure it would have been alright.
But just as I’m going to get out of bed, I’m suddenly grabbed, making me look down and I realize that Rowena is watching me with a heated look in her eyes. I’m certain that she can see what she has done to me but I also know that I’m not going to say anything else about it.