Page 149 of The Problem with Players

“I think that’s what happened. You feared that he liked it. That he loved it even, because that went against a core belief in your system.”

“What belief is that?”

“That you, Avery, are unlovable. Nathan coming along tochallenge that belief is a lot for your system to break down and understand.”

Tears pinched at the back of my eyes. I looked down at my hands for a moment, but no words came out.

“It also scares you,” she continued. “Having him love you, I mean. Because you like to control tasks, and you can’t control the outcome of his love. You can’t pace it or shape it to fit beside your triggers. That’s his ship to sail. How he loves you is something you cannot steer. Love has no reins. That scares you.”

“Terrifies me.”

She nodded. “Understandable. But do you know the cool thing about love having no reins?”

“What’s that?”

She leaned forward and whispered, “It hasnoreins. Imagine how much love he could feed you if you opened up said book again. Imagine how deeply another could care for you, how much you could care for them, if you found the courage to read each other’s hard pages out loud together. Imagine a love that doesn’t rot. Imagine a love story that only grows.”

“Dang,” I muttered, shaking my head. “You’re worth every penny.”

She grinned. “I’ll see you next week.”

47

NATHAN

AUGUST

As Avery walked up to the field for our August meeting, she narrowed her eyes toward me with a suspicious stare. “Why are you looking at me like that?” she asked, waving a finger in my direction.

“Like what?”

“Like you have something up your sleeves, with that wicked smile and all,” she urged, gesturing toward me.

I took a few steps in her direction and crossed my arms over my chest. “There’s nothing wicked about my smile.”

Her brows rose. “Oh, there’s something extremely wicked about your smile. What’s going on?”

“I figured maybe for today’s meeting, we could do something a little different.”

She pulled out a hair tie and tossed her long hair up into a high ponytail. “Like?”

I flicked my thumb against my bottom lip. “I figured maybe you’d like to ride my stallion.”

“Nathan!” Avery gasped, her eyes widening as if I’d just asked her to fuck me on home plate.

Though, I wouldn’t be opposed to that idea…

“Chill. Not this stallion.” I gestured over to the horse walking around the fenced in field. “That one.”

Her eyes wandered over to Lightning, who was wandering around, eating some grass. It was a perfect day for a ride, and I knew Avery had been thinking about giving it a go from what my mother told me.

A shot of nerves raced through her body as she shook her head. “Oh, no. It’s been so long…”

“He loves you. He’ll let you ride.”

“I don’t know…”

“You scared?”

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