Page 97 of The Problem with Dating

I wanted to be free from the chains that had somehow slipped around my ankles without me knowing it. I wanted to breathe again.

Still, to this day, Cole tried to suffocate me. Even speaking to Lindsay felt like a pillow over my mouth, ordering me to return to the places that once shattered me.

“He’s in therapy,” she told me. “He’s working on himself, Yara.”

“That’s good, Lindsay. I’m glad.”

“Do you think there’s ever a chance—”

“No.” I shook my head. “There’s not. I closed that chapter of my life.”

Her small, fatigued body trembled slightly. “Yes, I understand. You closed not only his door, but mine, too. And here I am taking care of Cocoa for you every few days because that’s what family does. We help each other.”

I arched an eyebrow. “What do you mean you’re taking care of Cocoa? Cole is responsible for her, not you.”

“You know he’d forget to feed her and walk her with his schedule. So he drops her to me every time. I don’t mind. It’s my job to take care of him and that involves Cocoa.”

“No,” I stated, shaking my head. “That’s not your job. And I’d rather Cocoa stay with me all the time than with you. The whole point of the dog swap was because I thought Cole missed her.”

“Don’t try to take this from me, too, Yara,” Lindsay warned. “That dog is the closest thing I have to a grandbaby since you seemed too busy to give me one of those.”

More guilt. Piles and piles of heaviness that weren’t mine to carry.

I bit my tongue so I wouldn’t say something cruel even though many words shot through my brain.

Lindsay shifted her bags in her arms and stood taller. “I hope you can live with the choices you made, Yara. I hope you can face the fact that you didn’t only break my son’s heart but you shattered mine, too.”

That guilt punch landed straight against my heart and bruised my soul. I wondered how many people carried bruises to their soul that were never theirs to withstand?

It felt unfair that I was supposed to feel guilty for the sins of another’s actions. It wasn’t right that I was left gasping for air when Cole was the one who almost completely choked the life from my lungs.

* * *

“You and Alex Ramírez?”Cole asked as we stood in the dog park to exchange Cocoa the evening after Alex and I soft-launched our relationship. After Cole’s mother left me feeling like complete crap. “Are you kidding me, Yara?”

“We shouldn’t talk about this, Cole,” I replied, secretly happy that he’d found out. I wanted him to realize that I was moving on, so he’d finally back off. I needed him to know that we would not get back together. After my exchange with Lindsay, I knew it was extremely important for it to be clear that the chapter of my life with the Parkers was over. A part of me even wanted to fight with him about Cocoa, but I knew his outburst was more than I wanted to deal with after a somewhat heavy afternoon.

“Was he the one whose sweats you were wearing?” he questioned.

“Cole—”

“I’m not intimidated by him, Yar. If you’re just doing it to get back at me—”

“I’m not,” I told him, taking Cocoa’s leash from his grip. “And anything going on between Alex and me is our private business. You don’t get an invite to our life.”

“‘Our life?’ So what? The two of you are anournow? Since when?”

“Long enough for it to matter.”

“How so? The other day, you were going on a date with Josh. How is this real with Alex?”

I knew there wasn’t a good way to explain it, so I did the only thing I could think to do. I lied, lied, lied. “Things with Alex and me started off as friends with benefits, and then we transitioned into something more, okay, Cole? Is that what you wanted to hear? Feelings developed, and neither of us realized it until after the Josh situation happened.” I smiled sweetly at him. “I guess I can thank you for that. If you hadn’t tell Josh not to date me, then I would’ve never realized my feelings for Alex.”

Cole’s face was deep red as the anger built within him. His nostrils flared as his hands formed fists. “Out of all people, you’d pick someone like him? He’s a cocky ass who thinks he can get away with whatever he wants.”

“You have no clue who he is. And I’ve only dated one jerk in my life. I left that chapter behind me. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a date tonight.”

“A date? You’re just going to leave Cocoa alone at your place? Some mother you are.”

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