Page 17 of The Problem with Dating

“What’s wrong with you?” Alex asked as he placed his hand in the way of the door.

“A lot, actually! Now if you would just—oh heyyy!” I sang to JohnJake as he stepped into the elevator.

“Hey, neighbor,” he said the moment he saw me. He then looked at Alex. “Thanks for holding that.”

Alex nodded in response.

“I just moved in not too long ago. I’m Josh,” he stated to Alex.

Josh! Of course his name was Josh.That’s right. Duh.

“Alex,” he dryly replied with his stupid-looking face, not knowing that he was now my ultimate enemy for the betrayal of allowing my sweet Josh onto our elevator.

Okay, I lied. Alex wasn’t stupid-looking. I could see how some people could find him attractive if they were into the whole dark and mysterious “I may or may not have been the monster fromBeauty and The Beastin a past life” grump appeal. I, myself, found him attractive until I witnessed his monstrous side.

Josh stepped backward and placed his back against the wall of the elevator. He sniffed the air. “It kind of smells like crap in here, no?”

Alex looked toward me, then back at Josh. “Don’t look at me,” he muttered. He gestured at me. “Rumor has it she stepped in dog shit outside. That or she shat herself.”

Ohmygosh. I was riding the elevator with the worst human alive. The tall, dark, and annoyingly handsome Alex Ramírez, folks. The newest pain in my ass.

My cheeks flushed as embarrassment built in the pit of my stomach. Before I could say anything, we were already at Alex’s stop, and he exited without another word. I figured that was how the worst human alive would’ve worked—dropped bombs and walked off with a smug look.

The elevator closed, leaving Josh and I alone. Me, him, Cocoa, and the millions of thoughts rushing through my brain. None of which were worthy of leaving my lips.

When the elevator opened to the sixteenth floor, he stepped to the side to allow me out, like a freaking gentleman.

“Thank you,” I said, squeezing poor Cocoa to my chest as much as possible to hide my chest.

“Of course, have a good day,” he said.

“You too.” I started toward my apartment and paused. “Josh?”

“Yeah?”

“I didn’t poop myself.”

He laughed and it sounded like magical trumpets of joy. “I figured that much, Yara. I’m almost certain that your poop would smell like roses,” he said with a wink. “Oh, and Yara?”

“Yes?”

“You have white stuff around your mouth,” he said, pointing at my face before unlocking his door and going inside.

Panic filled my chest as I dashed inside my apartment. I hurried to my bathroom mirror to find the lovely remnants of my drunken piña coladas binge. Yet seeing it on my face made it look like somethingverydifferent from piña coladas.

Oh, wasn’t life grand?

CHAPTER5

Yara

After one of the worst days of my life, I tried my best to shake off my bad mood. That wasn’t easy when I kept seeing the Sip & Dish ladies in town, who seemed to be going out of their way to avoid me. That was fine by me. I had nothing to say to any of them. Besides, I still had my sisters. They would never kick me out of a group, minus that time when we were kids. We’d play as if we were Destiny’s Child, and they kicked me out because I was convinced I was Beyonce, yet they made me Michelle, so I threw a fit.

Outside of that, I had built-in best friends who would never abandon me.

No steps. No halves. Just full.

That was Daddy's motto when it came to my sisters and me.

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