Page 2 of Queen of Spades

“Don’t forget,” he murmured, and the pills appeared in his other hand. I used the last of my water to swallow them down and sank back into the leather seat, waiting for the pain to fade away once more.

“-okay?” I looked over at Doug, and he was smiling, holding out his hand to me. I looked out the window, and the sun had set. When had we stopped?

I let Doug lead me out of the car, and he caught me as I stumbled, putting his arm around my waist for support. Wewere at the club already,so I guess I’d missed dinner?Doug led us toward the VIP section, his grip tightening when he saw his crew. I took a seat as quickly as I could, my legs too wobbly to do much else. Everyone ignored me as Doug sat down at my right, already deep into some story I had probably heard before.

Someone thrust a glass into my hand, and I looked down at it, frowning. It was gin. Doug didn’t usually order me gin. He liked it when I drank champagne, some sort of a status symbol thing. I took a sip, my mind fading out as I focused on the music, letting the deep bass pulse through my ribcage. The taste of the gin reminded me of dancing, of hands on my hips, and a large body pressed against mine. Levy’s scarred hands gripping my ass as he lifted me off the ground so I could wrap my legs around him…

No, come back, don’t think about him.

“Gracie, who gave you that?” Doug snapped, snatching the glass out of my hand. “Nobody touches your drinks but me or Shen, remember?” I blinked in confusion, I could’ve sworn… my mind was swimming, and I couldn’t breathe.

“Can I go to the bathroom, please?” I asked, and Doug helped me to my feet, Shen appearing to grab my elbow.

“Don’t take long,” he ordered, and I nodded, letting Shen guide me through the crowd toward the bathroom. He checked inside before letting me go in, and I was relieved when he shut the door, leaving me alone in blissful silence. I walked slowly toward the sink, feeling off-balance in my high heels as the world slid in and out of focus. I tried to avoid the mirror, but my gaze flitted up as I neared out of habit. I grimaced at the sickly apparition staring back at me. It was as if the drugs leeched the color right out of my body. My skinwas nearly translucent, a stark contrast to the dark circles under my eyes. Bruises covered my arms, and I frowned, my fingers grazing over a fresh-looking one on my forearm. I didn’t remember getting this, or any of them for that matter. Maybe I was bumping into things during my blackouts, that would make sense.

A wave of dizziness had me clutching the edges of the counter, and I closed my eyes, willing it to pass. When I opened them again, a flash of movement caught my eye. I spun, nearly losing my balance, searching for the face I’d just seen in the mirror. “Levy?” I murmured, staring at the empty bathroom.

I was losing my mind. My brain couldn’t decipher between past and present anymore. “Leave me alone, please,” I whispered, pressing my palms into my eyes. The door swung open, and I flinched, but it was only Shen, an impatient look on his face. “I’m coming,” I mumbled, glancing once more into the empty space before following Shen back into the club.

Flashes of faces, snippets of conversations, everything blurred together in a horrible jumble in my mind. I remembered… champagne? The taste on my tongue, someone tipping my glass so I would drink; hands-on my waist, steading me, gripping me too hard.

The thrum of exhaustion filtered through the haze.I just want to sleep, please, let me sleep.

Lips pressed against my neck, and rough hands pulled at my dress. I pushed them off, groaning. A hand gripped my hair, wrenching my neck back until I cried out, and I clawed at it, fighting against its hold. I was in a bed, was it my bed? I couldn’t tell.I just want to sleep.

“Take your meds, Gracie,” Doug commanded, from somewhere nearby.

No, I don’t want to, please. I can’t think anymore.

Something was forced past my lips, and water trickled into my mouth, making me choke. A hand closed around my mouth, and my nose was plugged, forcing me to swallow so I could breathe again.

“I don’t feel well,” I mumbled, trying to lay down. I somehow ended up on my back, and someone pushed me down into the bed.Please let me sleep. I struck out weakly, pushing at the weight threatening to crush my chest. Something struck my face, the pain barely registering. I kicked and clawed until my limbs grew too heavy to fight anymore. The numbness trickled in again, the world bleeding away around the edges.Let me sleep… let me sleep… I just want to…

Chapter two

Grace

Sounds filtered through my brain, slipping away before I could grasp what they were. Why was it so noisy in my room? Was that an alarm? I reached up to rub my eyes, and my hand met resistance halfway to my face. I blinked my eyes open and saw a thin tube taped to the back of my hand.What the hell?I blinked dully, looking around the room; not my room as I’d thought, but what looked like… a hospital? The alarm picked up, and I realized it was my heart rate. I was attached to a monitor or something, the clip on my finger connecting to one of the screens behind the bed.Why am I in a hospital? Had there been an accident?

I tried desperately to remember what had happened, but my memory was blank. Looking around again, I was a little shocked to find that I was completely alone in here.Where is Shen? What is going on?I sat up and gasped as pain wrenched through my chest, threatening to split me in half. Falling back into the bed, I struggled to breathe, my lungs refusing to takemore than a sip or two of air at a time. It felt like I’d been crushed.

“He-help,” I wheezed, and my throat burned as though I’d tried to swallow a cheese grater. Stark panic began to flood my veins, and the machine behind me set off a cacophony of alarms as I struggled to breathe, tears running down my face as my consciousness wavered. The door opened, and two women in scrubs burst in, looking concerned. One of them checked the machines behind me while the other tried to calm me down, murmuring words that I couldn’t hear over the ringing in my ears. My attention was dragged back to the door, and my brother stalked inside, his dark hair messy and his shirt wrinkled. I stared at him, looking at the deep gouges in his face, like someone had raked their nails across his face.

No… no…I shook my head, my stomach heaving when he glanced down at me, the corner of his lips curving up in a twisted, private smile. I turned back to the nurse and grabbed her hand, clutching it tightly as her eyes widened in alarm. “He-l-” The words wouldn’t come, every exhale hurt so badly I began to choke. A prick in my arm made me flinch, and I glanced up at the second nurse as she backed away quickly, a syringe in her hand.

Please, don’t make me fall asleep again. Something’s very, very wrong. I pleaded with her, my mouth opening and closing as I tried to force out a sound, any sound. The world dulled, and my eyelids grew heavy. I lowered down onto my pillow, sinking back into the bed as the quiet enveloped me once more.

Someone was holding my hand, stroking a little pattern across the back of it. I smiled softly, feeling fuzzy, but that was okay. My eyes focused slowly. Someone in a white coat was standing beside the bed, talking to me,I think? They weren’t looking at me, and I focused on his lips, trying to decipher what he was saying.

“-mind you watch her around the stairs for a bit, she might be a bit unbalanced while she adjusts to the medication.” His words took a while to register in my brain, and I looked over at the person holding my hand. It was Doug of course, it was always Doug. He smiled at me, nodding along with what the doctor was saying. I opened my mouth, wanting to ask why I was in the hospital, but my tongue wouldn’t obey my commands. Doug patted my hand lightly.

“Don’t try to talk, alright Gracie? Your throat is damaged. They had to pump your stomach.”

I frowned,who was ‘they’? Why did my stomach need pumping?As soon as a thought took shape, it floated away, leaving me drifting and confused.

“Don’t worry sweetheart, I’ll be taking you home really soon.” Doug grinned, giving my hand a squeeze.

I nodded quietly, wondering why my stomach clenched at the thought of going home with him. He stood up and followed the doctor out of the room, leaving me alone with the noisy machines behind me. I looked over at the window,wondering what day it was.How long have I been here?My mind drifted, my eyes drifting shut.

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