Page 74 of Choose You

“What the fuck am I supposed to do, Adam? She doesn’t want me.”

“Language, boys,” Momma scolds.

“You fight for her!” Adam slams his fist down on the table, causing everyone to flinch. He so rarely loses his temper, so when he does, it surprises us all. Camille rests her hand on his forearm, and he immediately calms. He closes his eyes and when he opens them again, he looks sad instead of angry. “What you two have is rare, and you’re both being stubborn.”

“I’m not being stubborn. Trust me, if she would have me, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. I threw everything out there for her, and she turned me down. She’ll never forgive me for the things I’ve done. I have to accept that and move on with my life.”

“But she said she forgave you. I hoped that meant you two could work this out.”

“When did you talk to Jess?”

“A couple days ago. She came by my office to discuss renovating some of the back rooms at The Wine Room into living space.”

I shake my head and groan. “Of course, she did.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Adam rears back like he’s offended.

“Nothing.” I wave him off. I don’t want to explain to my entire family how Jessica and I can’t seem to communicate. “You can tell her that’s not necessary. By the end of this week, I’ll be out of her house.” I glance over at Momma. “Assuming you’ll let Emmie and me stay here until I find a place to live.”

Momma reaches over and squeezes my arm. “Of course, you can stay here. But Matthew, what about the clinic and everything you built?”

“I’m gonna have to move it, too.” I take another sip of my beer and frown when my drink comes up empty. I really need morealcohol for this conversation. “I’ll probably buy some land and build. I’m in a better position than I was three years ago so I can afford it now.”

“I hear Old Man Tate is looking to sell some of his land,” Sam says. It took months after Joseph hired him as the ranch manager for him to be comfortable at our Sunday dinners. But now he’s just like one of the family.

Joseph punches him in the arm. “You’re not helping, man.”

“Ouch.” Sam rubs his arm. “Why did you do that?”

“Thanks, Sam. I’ll check that out.” When I look back at Momma her worry only deepens. “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine.”

“But you’re my son. I’ll always worry about you.” The tears in her eyes break me. I reach out for her and pull her into a tight hug.

“Momma don’t cry. I know this looks bad now, but it’ll all work out. Emmie is young, and she’ll forgive me. But Jess, she’ll never find it in her heart to truly forgive me if I take her house. I don’t have a choice.”

She nods and leans back in her seat. She wipes her face dry but doesn’t look convinced that I’m right. I glance around the table, and everyone just stares at me like they don’t know what else to say. What is there to say? I fucked up with Jessica and can’t fix it. Time to move on.

“Listen, guys. I’m just trying to do the right thing. It’s not easy because I really don’t know what the right thing is. If you have a better suggestion, I’m all ears.”

The room remains silent. I glance at each person around the table, and no one offers any help. I open my mouth to speak, but Momma beats me to it.

“Only you can answer that, sweetie. We can’t tell you want to do. So, search your heart for the answer and do that.”

I nod and give Momma a weak smile. “Well, that’s what I did, and my heart tells me I can’t take her house. So, if you all can spare some time this week, I could really use some help moving.”

My brothers and Sam nod, but no one seems happy about it. Hell, I’m not happy about it. But it’s what I have to do.

CHAPTER 27

JESSICA

The sound of light footsteps walking over gravel causes my entire body to stiffen. Even before turning around, I know it's not Matthew. My senses are too attuned to him. I know when he’s near, even if I can’t see him.

Caring for my horse this week has been a challenge. We never ran into each other, but he was near every day. I felt him. It disappointed me that I never saw him.

Every ounce of my being craves him, needs him. I can’t stop my body’s reaction to a potential run-in withhim. But the stubborn voice whispering in my ear continues to tell me to be cautious.

I mostly want to crush that voice and put it to rest, but it has a strong hold on me. Too many years of living with it, I guess. That voice is the same one that has kept me sane for all these years. It’s helped me focus and grow my business into what it is today. And it’s the same voice that will guide me through this next phase of my life and create something wonderful with the vineyard.

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