Page 178 of Of Nine So Bold

He exhaled, taking a step closer. I tensed, fighting not to retreat.

“I should apologize.” Propriety seemed to wrap around him like a cloak. “I did not realize that what happened with our magic was—” A frown creased his face briefly as he searched for words. “How it might have been a risk to you.”

I blinked, confused. “Yousavedme, Byron. What happened from then on wasn’t your fault. And besides, you heard Ignatius. Maybe it’s fine.”

He shook his head. “I should have been more careful.”

I really didn’t want to argue with him. Not when it was just the two of us here, maybe alone together for the last time before we faced my stepmother,hopefullysurvived, and then he left for good.

“Apology accepted, then.” I turned away again.

“Gwyneira.”

I bit back a curse. Why did it hurt to hear him say my name?

Footsteps crunched on the dirty tile. His hand caught my arm.

“Are you angry at me?” Surprise and worry showed on his face. “I swear to you, whatever I’ve done I?—”

“It’s not you.”

It was everything.

The concern in his eyes was almost more than I could bear.

“What is it then?” he asked, his voice gentle.

And that gentleness hurt more than cold propriety ever could.

As if seeing my heartache, he looked around quickly and then strode over to a wooden chair. Dusting off the seat, he brought it back and urged me down into it. Crouching before me, he took my hands between his own. “What’s wrong? Please. Tell me.”

His emerald gaze transfixed me. Why did he have to choose tonight, of all nights, to behave so compassionately?

But it pulled the truth from me. “I’m worried.” My voice came out barely stronger than a whisper.

He only nodded, urging me to go on.

A tiny, desperate breath left me. “I’ve studied strategy. War tactics going back for centuries. My father and my tutors did everything they could to train me to be a good queen.” I shook my head, unable to look away. “And I don’t know how tobegintaking back my throne. Even now, even after all these days and weeks… I don’t. Not without the risk one or all of us could die.”

Shame finally shattered the hold his gaze had on me. “And even if we do succeed, that’ll only mean it’s time for you to leave.”

He was silent.

My shame grew, burning in my chest like it would devour me from the inside. Pulling my hands from his, I rose from the chair. “I’m sorry. I should go.”

I started away, making it almost to the door before his voice came from behind me again.

“Princess, stop. Please.”

My feet came to a halt, but I didn’t turn. “The Order needs you, Byron. More than maybe they know. You’re honorable and wise and…” Gods, this hurt. “And you deserve to reap the rewards for how you’ve held true to your calling all these years.”

I started to move.

“And if I can’t do that?”

My footsteps stopped at his words.

“If Casimir’s worries were right and the tie between us causes pain if we’re too far away from one another?”

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