Page 122 of Inked Adonis

“Yeah,” she huffs, doubling down. “I see you, Samuil. I see it all. The only reason you want to hold on to the family business is to prove your dad wrong. But you could prove them all wrong by?—”

“By what?” I abandon the suitcase, stalking toward her. “By running away with you? You and I would ride off into the sunset together, chasing after some intangible happily fucking after, and then I would finally be the man you want me to be?”

Nova stops, stunned, as tears wink at the corners of her eyes. “This isn’t about me.”

“Of course it is, Nova.” Every step I take forward, she holds her ground. “This is about you treating me like one of your clients. But I’m not some rescue dog you can train up with treats and cuddles. My past can’t be erased that easily. Scars don’t go away at the snap of your fingers.”

“That’s not?—”

“Just like moving out and leaving your family behind didn’t change how completely fucked you are.”

I hear my own words and I fucking hate it. I can feel myself going too far. Giving her scars that won’t go away at the snap ofmyfingers.

But fucking hell, what am I supposed to do? Does she think the wolves at the door will slink off just because I ask nicely? I’m thefuckingpakhan,goddammit! I am Samuil fucking Litvinov and there are things I must do because there is no one else in this world who can do them.

I have the bloody remains of my employees in Moscow flashing in my head. When I close my eyes, I see Nova’s front door being kicked in. I see the devastation my enemies would rain down on her, and I can’t pull myself back from the ledge.

Not when her life is on the line.

Tears pour down her cheeks, but her expression is steely. Determined.

She’s not backing down, and I need her to. I need to know she’ll be safe.

So if cruelty is what’s required, then I can do that. I will hurt her to keep her from harm. I will ruin her to save her.

“You ran from your demons, Nova, and it got you nowhere. But I’m no coward.” I jab the button for the elevator. My phone is vibrating yet again. I have to go.

“Are you saying I am?” Her voice is thick, her face damp.

Fuck, this isn’t how I wanted to leave.

I wanted one more hour. One more chance to press her into our sheets, to map every inch of her skin with my hands, my mouth. To make her understand with touch what I can’t say with words.

I wanted to leave her limp and sated, already desperate for the next time.

But there isn’t time.

There’s never enough time.

“I’m saying you have a habit of being mowed over by powerful men.” I hurl my suitcase into the elevator and turn to face her. “At least while you’re warming my bed and sucking my cock, you get something out of it. At least I’ll keep you alive. Quid pro fucking quo.”

I push the “Ground Floor” button and hold her watery gaze. “If you go back to your apartment, Myles will drag you back. Stay here. Stay safe.”

Say something else,you cruel fucking bastard,I tell myself.Don’t leave things like this.

But her shoulders slouch, and I know she’s going to stay. I know Nova will be safe while I’m gone.

If she’s alive and hates me, that’s a price I’m willing to pay.

42

NOVA

Funny how different types of pain leave different kinds of scars.

The mauling I survived at seven left permanent marks on my hand and thigh. But watching Samuil walk away yesterday? That’s the kind of wound that bleeds on the inside, invisible but devastating. The kind that makes me drag myself to work even though every cell in my body wants to curl up in his sheets and breathe in what’s left of his scent.

Instead, I’m getting played by a Labradoodle.

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