Page 76 of When You Are Mine

Kristeene fixed her eyes ahead, but she was obviously seeing a scene years past.

“He had no idea who I was, who my family was. He was so ambitious and driven and self-contained. That ambition frightened me. I was afraid he wouldn’t want me for myself, but for all that came with me. I lied to him and told him I was on my own in New York for the first time. At the end of the week, we couldn’t imagine life without each other. A week, and it was so deep and like I had known him all my life.”

Kerris bit the inside of her jaw until she tasted blood. She knew what that felt like, but she couldn’t even nod her head in acknowledgment. It would be too telling, and Kristeene already knew too much.

“We eloped.” A defiant grin lit Kristeene’s much thinner, but still beautiful face. “And then the trouble started. He was livid when he found out I was one ofthoseWalshes. Said everyone would think he’d married me for my money, and that everything he achieved people would assume had been given to him because of my family. It all backfired. He worked so hard to prove it wasn’t true that we kind of lost each other. And I only made it worse by suggesting that he’d be able to spend more time with his family if he’d just go work for my father.”

“Oh.” Having met Martin Bennett, Kerris could imagine how well that had gone over.

“Yes, oh.” Kristeene’s smile held more regret than humor. “I was so young. I didn’t know how to handle a man like Martin. He needs to conquer, to win, to come out on top. He needs the pursuit. And I wanted to take that away from him because everything he pursued took him away from me.”

Kristeene blinked several times, obviously staving off tears.

“Eventually, we just lived separate lives.” Kristeene reached up to stroke her lustrous hair out of habit, her hand falling listlessly to her side when she encountered the silk scarf hugging her naked scalp.

“I had to raise Walsh. And Martin had to build Bennett Enterprises. He had so much to prove, and none of it had anything to do with us.” Kristeene shook her head and looked up at the ceiling. “Oh, he fooled himself that he was doing it for us, but I didn’t need any of it. I would have loved that man if he had decided he wanted to sell hot dogs on the street.”

Kerris laughed a little, afraid to draw too much attention to herself in case Kristeene stopped. They had grown close, but Kerris suspected Kristeene had never talked about any of this with anyone. It was a precious insight into the tumultuous relationship that had shaped so much about Walsh.

“He was unfaithful, you know.” Bitterness swept away the last traces of Kristeene’s humor. “With his secretary. What a cliché. And I knew he regretted it. I even understood how it happened. He and I had drifted so far apart, but I never stopped loving him. For him to do that…”

Kerris frowned, dismayed at how upset this discussion was making Kristeene.

“You need to get some rest.” Kerris moved to stand and leave so Kristeene could rest.

“No, just let me.” Kristeene broke off to press the button that released morphine into her system. “I’ll get loopy soon, so we don’t have long. Sit down.”

Kerris settled back into the seat, shifting under the renewed intensity of Kristeene’s eyes.

“You know Walsh is a lot like his father.” Kristeene’s eyes left Kerris nowhere to hide. “I did my best to temper it, but that boy has his father’s DNA as sure as he has mine. I always thought he escaped that single-mindedness, that ability to focus so completely on something he wants. And then I saw him with you.”

“Please don’t say that.” Kerris looked at her hands clutching the sterile bed sheets, unable to meet Kristeene’s eyes.

“I didn’t really let myself see what it truly was until your wedding day,” Kristeene continued as if Kerris hadn’t spoken. “He fooled everyone else, but I could see how miserable he was. And then it was too late.”

Kristeene’s words settled around them like snowflakes, melting into their skin with the iciness of truth, quickly absorbed.

“Walsh is also like me, though,” Kristeene said. “He always wants to do what’s right. He would never violate anyone’s wedding vows.”

Kerris shifted in the hard plastic seat, thinking of the kiss Cam had witnessed. They had both lost sight of what was right for a moment, and it had changed everything. The first tear startled her, with a mind of its own, slithering down her cheek, waiting for others to follow.

“Tell me,” Kristeene said, her soft voice inviting Kerris’s confidence. “Tell me why my boys can’t even be in the same room.”

And Kerris did. She told her the whole beautiful, gory tale, not leaving out even the most shaming parts. And she told her about that last kiss with Walsh, how it had torn through her preconceived notions of fidelity and love and good and bad, dismantling everything she had always believed about herself.

“And now Cam’s acting like nothing happened.” Kerris plucked at the sheets on Kristeene’s bed. “Like Walsh doesn’t even exist. I don’t know what to do.”

“Can you do this, Kerris?”

“Do what?”

“Can you stay married to Cam feeling what you do for Walsh?”

“Oh, God, I’d never leave Cam.” Shock widened Kerris’s eyes. “I could never do that to him. After all he’s been through? But I don’t know how to make it right.”

“First of all, figure out your course, and stay true to it.” Kristeene’s eyes flickered shut, snapping back open before the drug-induced darkness completely crowded out the clarity of her mind. “A girl like you can’t live with guilt. You have to feel like you’ve stayed true. You’re like the river.”

“I don’t know what you mean.” Kerris thought the morphine must be kicking in and Kristeene was babbling.

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