Page 53 of The Botanist and the Beast

"Be honest with me, Theo," he said staring hard at him. "Do you or do you not have a key to the east wing? Wereyou planning to leave this whole time? Was sleeping with me and confessing your feelings just to...just to manipulate me like Lyle's suggesting? If that's the case, then please just leave."

The words slapped him in the face. "You have to know I wouldn't do that to you."

"So, Lyle is lying about the key?"

"No, but its more complicated than that." His heart ached. "Why are you so quick to listen to what your ex-lover has to say and not me? How is that fair?"

"Don't make this about him and I being together. That has nothing to do with this."

Theo swallowed his jealousy and tried to explain himself through tipsy thoughts. "I went looking to see if you were staying in his bed when you avoided me. That's all. He told me where my things were and gave me the key. I wasn't actively trying to escape. If I was, I wouldn't have talked to you about visiting temporarily." He took a deep breath to calm down. "I'm sorry. I should've told you sooner. Hearing that from him must have been really hurtful. I'm not using you or trying to manipulate you. I really care for you. I wish you would see that. I just begged you to stay with me back at the lounge a few minutes ago."

"I'm sorry, too. I'm anxious about us so I jumped to conclusions quickly. Lyle doesn't like you. I should've been more skeptical, but I just panicked." He held himself. "But I still don't know if what we're doing is right."

"What do you mean by that?" A pit formed in Theo's stomach.

"Our relationship started with me holding you prisoner. That's the foundation of us. That isn't right. Add in the fact that I want to eat you, and this is a mess. I've been deluding myself into thinking I could gain more control when it'll get worse over time thanks to the curse." He took a shaky breath. "I was going to tell you tomorrow but tonight is better. I'm not upset with you. Iunderstand you weren't trying to sneak away but you obviously still want to go home. So, I think you should go. For good. You don't belong here."

"Because we drunkenly bickered once you want me to go?" Theo was dumbfounded. "That hardly seems fair."

"You should leave tonight while everyone is distracted," he went, on ignoring him. "The storm hits in two hours. After then, no one will be able to come after you even if they wanted to. Stay on the path and you won't see any dangerous animals."

Theo saw the way Sebastian fidgeted with his hands and avoided his eyes. “This doesn’t make sense.”

“I just—”

“You just held me in the yard asking for reassurance. You just said you wanted to spoil me. Sebastain, I’m not stupid. There's something else going on here. What else did Lyle say? Why are you always hiding things from me instead of talking it out?”

"This conversation is over. Now go," he snipped. "Lyle put your bow and arrow and things in my room. Sober up, gather your things, and leave. I don't want to see you in the morning."

"Are you drunk right now?" Theo said with a laugh of disbelief. "We were fooling around just hours before, now you're tossing me aside. You’re really going to do this?”

"Goodbye, Theo."

Theo reached for him again, but this time claws raked his wrist, making him yelp. "You scratched me?" He stared at the red marks in disbelief.

"I said go."

Theo stood there bewildered as he watched him storm out. He stood for a while there, hoping he'd come back and say he was sorry, but the kitchen stayed abandoned.

He went up to the bedroom and collected his things, continuously checking the door for Sebastian.Just come and tellme you were drunk and angry. Come and tell me you don't want me to go.

He walked the long way through the hall to prolong his departure. He strained his ears for hurried feet or paws racing after him. But Sebastian ever came. So, he left.

He walked up the winding snowy road through town and stood at the gate. The warmth of the veil blew against his face while frigid winds hit his back. He looked up at the large moon and starry sky that seemed to stop at a blanket of storm clouds over the kingdom. They thundered, hinting at the impending big storm that would consume the lands any minute now.

He ventured back into the lush veil. With every step away, that familiar pull in his chest grew. This time, though, it wasn't pulling him towards any fog. It was pulling him towards Sebastian's arms. But just as he did back home, he forced himself to press on and not look back.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

By the next afternoon, Theo was gone, and it was a whiteout. The enraged sky thundered, and heavy snowfall beat the roof. Harsh winds screamed across the lands, and the brittle trees clattered against the windows as if trying to break in. It felt like the kingdom itself was heartbroken.

Normally Sebastian would go out and hunt in the extreme weather, but he had no desire to. He had no desire to eat, to sleep, or to do much of anything at all. Instead, he sat curled up in a chair in the corner of the lounge, nursing a hangover. His tail wouldn't go away, and he passively bit it between his teeth to distract from the pain in his chest.

The guards were still drinking warmed liquor or eating a stew made by Collette. They milled about, but he had no interest in speaking with anyone.

"Where's your ward?" Lyle asked, coming over. He sipped from a mug and leaned on the armrest of Sebastian's chair.

Sebastian dropped his tail and did his best to not sound as irritated as he felt. "Day off. Nothing to do in the storm." He had hoped his answer would satisfy, but Lyle didn't leave. Instead, he let his fingers brush the tip of his tail. He swatted Lyle’s hand away. "Don't touch me."

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