Page 60 of Snowy Secrets

The raw honesty of his words pierces through the icy barriers I've built around my heart. Tears stream down my face, a mixture of sadness, anger, and a flicker of hope.

"River," I begin, my voice trembling, "I don't know what to say."

It doesn't matter, right? Because even if he loves me, he's leaving. Yes, Marcus and Wyatt will be there for me, and I will be there for them. But we are a unit, and to carry on in this arrangement knowing one of the three has a constant kink for abandonment?

I don't know how I can survive it, even with all the love I feel for the other two.

It doesn't make up for my anger toward the man by my side. Anger and rage and love.

"Where are you going?" I finally ask in a muffled voice.

"Nowhere," he replies hoarsely. My heart skips a beat and I turn my head sideways.

"I'm not running again," he says, looking directly into my eyes. "Even if this doesn't work out and all you can give me is some time with you and Ginny, I'll take it. I'll take what light and darkness you have for me, Bella, and spend years being the man who shows up, even though I was an asshole first."

Is this really happening?

"River…" I stop and stumble with my words, entirely confused. "You…you're not mad at me?"

He chuckles and plants a gentle hand on my knee. "I was, at first. And then I considered what a mother would do when she'd handled with the hardest season of young parenthood all on her own. I'm lucky you let me live."

A grin unwittingly slips on my lips. "Well, that's kind of true."

His grip becomes firmer, and he circles a thumb over the thick fabric under his fingers. "But you took another chance. And I'm ashamed to say that even though I told you it'd be different, when the first thing I considered when you left was running away. Marcus showed me how much of a fool I was."

My throat constricts. "You really mean it, don't you?"

He nods. "I do. I'm staying, Bells."

"As are we," floats Wyatt's voice over my shoulder. He's standing with Marcus, both of them smiling like goofy mountain men. My mountain men.

"I've been an idiot too," I confess. "And so, so angry at the world, at you, at myself. I…it took me an age to see that this isn't what I want for any of us."

"Come back to the cabin," River entreats me now. He removes his hand, stands up, and drops on both knees in frontof me, earnestness etched into his face. "With Ginny. Let's try to make things right."

Finally, I let the tears fall freely. "What if…"

"Let's not think of the what ifs anymore," he interjects. "Because it's you and us. We'll find a way."

I nod through the tears, pulling him into a hug. Marcus and Wyatt leap in and join us until we're all a bundle on the floor of the gazebo.

The embrace ends, and I pull back to look at the men who have come to mean everything to me. I take a deep breath, steeling myself for what I have to do next.

"I need to talk to my dad," I say, my voice quavering. "I have to tell him about us."

River, Marcus, and Wyatt exchange glances, understanding the gravity of the situation. River nods, his eyes soft with empathy. "Want us to go with you?"

"No." I shake my head vehemently. "I need to do this alone. Can you wait by the Subaru?"

"Of course," replies Wyatt. "Take your time. We'll be here."

I watch them walk back toward Marcus' Subaru Outback, their figures blending into the snowy landscape. Turning toward my father's house, I feel a knot of anxiety tighten in my stomach. This conversation isn't going to be easy.

Inside, my father sits by the fireplace, a cup of coffee in his hand. He looks up as I enter, his face a mixture of suspicion and concern. He knows something is up.

"Dad," I begin, my voice shaking in the most undignified manner, "I need to talk to you about something important." All of a sudden, it's like I'm back in school, coming to tell him I couldn't win at the state track meet. He sets his cup down and leans back, eyes narrowing. "What is it, Bella?"

I take a deep breath and plunge in. "I need to tell you about my relationship. I'm with River, Marcus, and Wyatt."