Page 32 of Snowy Secrets

The way I ran all those years ago. The way I closed a door that should have always been open.

I can't let her get away. I can't. Without thinking, I push off from the chair, sending the bowl clattering down. There'll be time to deal with that later. I grip her elbow and pull her to me, whipping her around so her face is level with mine.

"No," I utter in a broken, hoarse voice. "Don't you dare fucking run."

Before she can reply, I bend my head and kiss her.

14

BELLA

The way River holds onto me frightens a small part of me. One that missed him and his hands and his mouth because he always made me feel good when he wanted to. His mouth demands without being crushing. And I succumb to it, softening with the memory of how I felt worshiped when we were together.

He swipes his tongue against my lips, and I open to him. I taste the alcohol on him, yet the heat of him seeps through. Maybe that's due to the circle of his arms or those big hands spread between my shoulder blades and along my hip. Somehow, he's gotten gentler. With everything Marcus told me about what's happened between the last time I saw him and now, I'm surprised he's not rougher.

With his forehead pressing to mine and our mouths falling free, River reaches up to cup my face and peer at me. Galaxies burn in his eyes, and the kiss he gives me has me falling through the floor, holding onto him to stay upright. My fingers curl into his shirt, and the energy between us shifts.

My body turns molten in his hands as he slowly touches my neck, my shoulders, my waist and ass. I sink a hand into his hairnow that it's grown out a little, and when I tighten the strands in my grip, River groans. It vibrates through me.

That old need spears me. I want what River can give me, and I want to give him a few moments of peace. Even if I haven't forgiven him for leaving me behind. Not yet. Maybe not ever.

But I can do this.

River swings me around in his arms, tumbling me back onto the soft leather couch. I use that momentum to make him fall under me, but he doesn't let an inch of me go.

Thighs spread over him, I sink against the hard length of him. He takes two handfuls of my ass and helps my hips move, accentuating my small thrusts. When another groan escapes him, his mouth drops to my throat, sucking and nibbling on every sensitive spot I have.

Those thick fingers and wide palms slide under my shirt, peeling it free of my skin and electrifying me. God, I need him inside me. I help him strip my shirt off before I work on his, yanking the front up until he reaches behind and pulls it off in one fluid movement.

I marvel at the shape of him, the strength, the heat.

River captures my mouth again, but when I spread my hands down his chest, I'm surprised by the differences. His skin is rougher, darker, but more than that, it carries what he's been through these last eight years.

I lean back as my touch spreads down the front of him, tracing the map of scars across his body. Dear God, it looks so much worse than what Marcus told me. How many times did he get shot, get torn through by shrapnel, and who knows what else? How on earth did River survive it all?

His hands fall to my thighs, thumbs tracing the seam of my jeans like he's waiting for me to find him lacking, to push him away because he's broken. But I won't push him away tonight. That won't be the reason I pull back later.

I drop a tense kiss on him to show him that the way survival has marked his body doesn't bother me. It doesn't make him any less than. I wish that—if anything—I could take that away from him.

Maybe I can for a little while.

Letting my hands trail lower, I wrap my hands around his fly and tear it open. River changes immediately, grip twisting at my own waist before he rolls me under him on the cushions. He's got my pants off before I finish bouncing, and my soft laugh has him pausing. Soft light shines behind him, putting him in shadow, but I can make out his small smile before he yanks the fabric free of my ankles.

Then I'm overwhelmed by his touch, how he cups my calves and thighs, traces my underwear and where it meets my skin. He's slowed down completely, like the mere sight of so much of me has him captivated. Reverent.

River's mouth dips to spread across my stomach, his nose pressing in like he can't get close enough. The way he looks up at me when he tugs the waistband off my hips silently asks me if this is okay.

"What's taking you so long?" I ask to spring him into action.

I don't need to be vulnerable with him. I just need to feel him, and vice versa.

He grins and shakes his head before dropping more kisses across my hips. "You make me feel drunk."

"You are drunk."

A half laugh rumbles against my skin, and I laugh a little, too. "What are you doing down there?"

"Mmm." He finishes tugging my panties off and spreads my knees. "Getting a taste of what I've been craving for years."

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