Page 76 of Dungeons and Drama

“Aren’t you supposed to be watching your sugar intake?”

He jolts in surprise. “The doctor suggested it. How did you hear that?”

“Nathan told me.”

He smiles knowingly and it puts me more on edge. “Of course, I should have known you two would be talking about everything now. But don’t worry about it.” He waves his hand dismissively. “Actually, tell me about homecoming. How are things going with Nathan?”

“Why did you tell Nathan about your health issues andnot me?” I ask instead of answering. My body is trembling slightly and I slide my hands under my thighs to keep them still. “And I don’t understand why you talked to everyone else at the store about my recitals and performances, but you never talked to me.”

He sits up straighter, his laid-back attitude gone with my tone. “We already talked about this. I wanted to tell my friends what a talented daughter I have.”

“But you didn’t want to tell me?”

I’m shocked that tears prick in the corners of my eyes. I don’t know where all this emotion is coming from, but suddenly I’m bursting with frustration and sadness about how little we’ve really spoken over the years. All the missed opportunities to share stories or to hear his thoughts on what was happening in my life. Even now he’s not telling me everything. And, sure, I haven’t been good about telling him things either, but it’s hard to be motivated when it’s a one-way street. Particularly when I’m not sure how much he’s even interested in my life outside of the store.

“I told you how much I loved your performances,” he says, his face intense and serious.

“No, you didn’t.” I wipe a tear away and cross my arms. “Maybe you like my singing at the store, but you never talked to me about my performances or…or mylife.I assumed it was because you didn’t care, but then I heard that you were going around talking to everyone else about it and I just don’t get it, Dad! Is it that you don’t like talking to me? Or spending time together? I’m sure you would have rather spent your weekends with your friends at the store than with me being bored.”

“Riley,no.” He puts out his hands as if to touch my knee or maybe pull me into a hug, but I stand and step away. “No, that was never it. I always love spending time with you. I love you. I’m just, I don’t know, I guess I’m bad at talking about things.”

“Well, I must get it from you, then, because I’m quitting the store.” I wrap my arms around myself. “That’s why Mom brought me here—so I could tell you that. My choir teacher asked me to help with rehearsals in the evenings, and hopefully, I’ll also be working on the musical this spring so I won’t have time to work anymore.”

He leans back like I slapped him, and the misery grows wider inside me.

“You’re quitting?” His voice is quiet.

“I won’t have time to do everything,” I whisper.

“But…I thought you liked it. You seemed so happy, and you have your friends there….” He’s speaking slowly, like he’s trying to put together a puzzle without all the pieces. “We were having such a great time. I wanted to keep building a stronger relationship with you.”

More tears come, but I swipe at my eyes and swallow hard. “Why didn’t you try sooner, then? And why do I have to work at the store for us to have a relationship? We could have always had one, but you never seemed that interested.”

He stands now. “That’s not true.”

“You didn’t even want to drive me from school to the store. You got Nathan to do it instead.”

He looks incredulous. “Are you serious? I did that as a favor to you. I figured you’d want the extra time with him. I’ve always wanted to spend more time with you—to knowyou better. But you and your mother built a little fort and kept me on the other side of the moat.” He takes a deep breath. “I’m glad you’re so close to your mom, but it’s been hard to find ways to connect.”

Guilt cuts through me, followed immediately by defiance. Am I not allowed to be close to Mom?

“If the only way you can connect with me is to guilt-trip me into staying at your store so we have something in common, then you aren’t trying very hard.”

Dad flinches and turns away. As soon as the words are out of my mouth, I feel sick—I didn’t come here to hurt him. But I can’t bring myself to take them back either. They’ve been waiting to come out for a long time.

We stand in silence and then he clears his throat. “Message received. You’re turning in your notice.”

I stare at the ground. A moment later, keys rattle.

“I’ll drive you back now. Sounds like you have a busy week ahead of you.”

Chapter Twenty-Six

I can’t help searching for Nathan as I walk through the halls Monday morning. A tiny part of me hoped to see him standing out front, waiting for me. And when I get to my locker, I hold my breath in case he’s somehow figured out the combination and filled it with paper hearts that’ll flutter to the ground when I open the door. Or stuck in a note about how he’s desperately in love with me.

Of course, there’s nothing like that. Nathan has never struck me as a particularly romantic guy. And if he was, he wouldn’t be using his skills on me, particularly after how we left things Saturday.

The meeting with administration is only two days away now. I will myself to focus on that—and that alone—as I shuffle from class to class. When lunch period comes, I spend the time in the choir room with Miss Sahni rather than face Nathan at our usual table. I’m a coward, I know, but tellmyself I’ll deal with everything after theShrekperformance. I just need to make it through the showcase Wednesday.

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