Page 45 of Man of Honor

WYATT

I woketo the first rays of morning slipping through my blinds.Normally, I was up and ready to hit the gym before dawn, but today felt different.My body was heavy and relaxed, humming with bone-deep contentment, and my mind was calm.

It reminded me of fishing alone: just me and the birdsong.I'd sit on the water for hours with a mind so clear and quiet I'd swear I could hear the earth's heart beating.In those moments, I wanted for absolutely nothing.

This morning felt like that.

Gentle rainfall filtered through my half-open windows, bringing in a fresh breeze and stirring up Gage’s lingering scent on my sheets.He’d been using my body wash all week, but it smelled different on him.Deeper. Sexier. My hand reached across the bed and landed on a cool, empty pillow.

That got my eyes open. Gage was never awake before me; his healing body needed sleep too badly.It was either a good sign...or a very bad one.I rolled onto my back, letting the morning sounds settle in: rain pattering on the roof, the creakof old beams, and the faint whistle of a cardinal.No shower running, no soft humming.No Gage.

I sat up, running a hand over my face and scratching the rough stubble on my jaw.The sliding barn door to the rest of the house was ajar, and Gage’s boots lay carelessly across the threshold where he’d kicked them off the night before.Movement out the window caught my eye, so I tugged on a pair of sweats and went to investigate.

Gage stood beside the cold firepit, shirtless and barefoot.Rain was rolling down his bare back, and he was wearing only a pair of gym shorts borrowed from my dresser.Even motionless, his body radiated physical confidence, but the mental side was another story.His expression was distant as he stared out at the creek and distant forest.I recognized that look. He was in his head, chewing on doubt like it was the only thing that kept him fed.

Jesus, Gage.

I bypassed the smell of brewing coffee and headed outside.Soggy grass muffled my steps, but he still heard me coming.Tension rippled across his back.Resting a hand between his shoulder blades, I said, "Trust me, the creek ain't gonna run if you look away.I've lived here more than a decade, and the only time it crawled out of its bed was during a flood."

He didn't turn, but his jaw tightened.I wrapped my arms loosely around his waist and rested my chin on his shoulder."Talk to me, sweetheart."

For a long time, only the rain and the distant rush of the creek filled the silence.Whatever was rattling around inside him wasn't something he wanted to let out."I don't know what todo now," he said eventually, cracking his neck and rolling his shoulders to ease the tension.

"What do you mean?"

His head turned just a fraction, like he wanted to make sure I heard but didn't want to risk looking directly at me."Boone was the one who gave us all direction.Purpose, you know? Now that he's gone...I don't know what to do anymore."

I sensed he wasn't finished, so I stayed quiet, catching clues from what I could see of his face at this angle.There was something raw in his expression: something young and afraid."I woke up next to you this morning, happier than I've ever been.But then I looked at you lying next to me, so goddamn handsome it hurts, and it hit me.I spent so much time chasing you, I never stopped to ask myself how it would work once I caught you.You've got your life together—house, career, responsibilities you never turn your back on.The kind of man Boone always wanted me to be.But me? What am I compared to that?"

“I could’ve gone to seminary like Gideon or started a business-like Dom," he continued, "but I didn't.I threw away the second chance Boone gave me on fights, fast cars, and running from things I’ll never outrun.Because it’s in here.” He thumped his chest hard with a fist.

I grabbed his wrist, stopping him before he could do it again.His biceps tensed, but I didn't let go, fighting him on it until he got the message.I held his gaze until the frustration bled out of him, and he sagged against me.

"You think what it says on my tax returns matters?" I asked incredulously."You think owning a house or a business makes someone a better man?"

He looked away. I caught his chin, gently turning his face back to mine."I've watched you fight your whole life.For yourself, your brothers, and now for Ivy.You think that counts for nothing?That'sbullshit, Gage."

His eyes searched mine, looking for a truth I knew he didn't believe."When I came home, I thought I finally had it figured out.But I look at you and...it feels like I'm still one step behind.I've got nothing to offer you, baby.Just trouble."

I wrapped my arms around him, threading a hand through his damp hair and tucking his face into my neck."I'll take it," I said, kissing his temple."Tangling with a Beaufort has always meant trouble.I'll bet even Rosalind knew that much the second she laid eyes on Atticus, hm? But I guarantee she didn't think twice."

Slowly, his arms came around me, lightly at first, and then with gratifying strength."I'm not a real Beaufort. I'm something worse."

"You're what I want," I murmured, nuzzling his temple, feeding him love with every touch.He wasn't ready for me to say it, but I'd make damn sure he felt it."Your place is here, Gage. You don't have to earn it.Just like this thing between us, you'll find your path when the time is right."

He trembled, breath catching, and then he softened in my arms.His fingers clung to the back of my shirt, holding tight, like he never wanted to let go.That was fine with me. We stood together, just drifting, and it felt like I was back on my boat in the middle of nowhere: quiet, still, gazing into forever.

I rocked him gently, swaying to the sound of the rain.Gage moved with me for a beat, then let out a small laugh."If you want to dance, we need some music."

"We don't need music. Just this." I kissed the cold shell of his ear and pressed his hand flat against my chest, directly over the steady beat of my heart.His fingers twitched and then curled into my shirt."That's the only rhythm we need."

My hands slid to cradle his hips, guiding him back and forth in a slow, easy glide.We swayed together, no rules, no hurry.Just the distant song of a wren and the white noise of the rain.His hand stayed on my chest, absorbing every beat.

“You’re mine,” I whispered, kissing him until our breath mingled.“I found you, Gage, and I’m gonna keep you.Forever.”

His breath caught, and he closed his eyes as if what I'd said hurt him.Then he took a deep breath and nodded."Okay," he said roughly, convincing himself as much as me."Okay."

My victory was short-lived. The deep rumble of an engine broke our spell.Gage lifted his head first, and we broke apart just as two vehicles ripped down the old dirt road and pulled into my driveway.I recognized the rusted Buick that Gage had been driving around, but not the sleek Harley snarling to a stop behind it.