Page 71 of The Healer

She lay still, staring at a familiar ceiling. The sun’s rays just kissed the horizon, but the city’s bustling pierced the morning’s calm. She swung her legs over the side of the bed and rested her elbows on her knees with her face in her hands. Exhaustion stung her nose and eyes. She sucked in a deep breath, trying to clear her head.

Pushing off the bed, she randomly chose jeans and a T-shirt, along with clean underwear. Clothed and while making coffee, she brushed her hair and planned the day. While cupping her mug until the heat warmed her fingers, she leaned against the windowsill and perused the street. From afar, people looked content, busy, and oblivious at how their lives could change in seconds.

After downing the coffee, she grabbed her phone, keys, and slipped a bank card in her back pocket. The drive to her parents’ house was opposite to traffic, and she arrived within minutes. Letting herself in, she strode to the kitchen, not losing her focus. If she could clear out one room, she would consider that a success.

On the dining room table, she placed the fridge photos and memorabilia she wanted to keep. A deep inhale of her father’s dark roast prickled tears behind her eyes, but she set the unopened bag aside, along with her mother’s variety of teas. When she missed them the most, she would make a cup and savor it, as if they shared the experience with her.

Their favorite mugs joined the small pile.

Then she emptied the food cabinets, stacking what she would donate, tossing what would expire soon. When her phone rang, a glance at the microwave showed the time was eight.

She blinked at the caller’s name and answered, “Gran?”

“Good morning, sweetheart. How are you feeling today?”

“Just like that? Like you didn’t toss me into the fire while you got it on with Amos? Or chose sides between me and Rhys?” She winced. Not what she had meant to say, but true, nonetheless.

“Don’t you take that tone with me, Ilona Strickland.” Gran huffed. “Do you truly resent my happiness?”

Ilona pinched the bridge of her nose, fighting the approaching headache. “No, of course not. That’s not… I didn’t…” Fuck. She gritted her teeth and tapped the sushi menu on the fridge. “Fine. I’m happy for you.”

“Now, answer my first question. I worry, y’know.”

What did Gran expect from her? “My parents died. I’m sure as shit not miraculously better.”

“Ilona. Stop it. This isn’t you, my girl.”

A tear slipped free, and she flicked it off her cheek. “I miss them, Gran. The house smells like Mom, and I keep expecting the front door to open to their usual banter.” She sucked in a shuddering breath. “I’m almost done with the kitchen. Rhys said I should call in an auctioneer. They’ll pack everything I don’t want.”

“That’s a brilliant idea. Are you taking care of yourself? Want me to come back for a while, to keep you company?” The tremor in Gran’s voice hinted at the deep emotion returning would summon within her.

Ilona shook her head. No, she had decided she would bear this. “I’m fine. Off to Amity today. I’m hoping to see a few familiar faces.” And test her blood. “I plan to call Indes to speak to Dr. Olson. So, don’t worry, Gran, I’ve got this.”

“Good. I’m proud of you, Ilona. Always have been.” She sniffed, which summoned another tear from Ilona. “Should I call tomorrow morning?”

“Please. It’s lovely hearing your voice.” What she wanted was a hug, engulfed in Gran’s spindly arms and lavender fragrance.

Ilona ran her fingertip down the sushi menu, forcing herself to focus on the individual letters. Having used the same technique during the long hours of studying, it helped ward off exhaustion or an anxiety attack. Her heartbeat calmed, and the vise around her chest eased, allowing her to breathe easier.

“I’ll call at the same time then. And please, eat something.”

Ilona chuckled. “Will do.” Rhys and now Gran knowing she wasn’t eating? Were they texting each other? She opened her mouth to ask, then bit her tongue. “Love you.”

“Love you too, my girl.”

After Gran ended the call, Ilona dialed the Chinese takeaway and ordered salmon sashimi. Her mouth salivated as her stomach gurgled. Not one for sushi, she opted for spring rolls when out with friends. Her craving for raw fish made no sense. Regardless, she asked for two portions and rattled off the address.

While she waited, choosing not to think how odd it was to eat sushi for breakfast, she went through the dining room. Mom’s expensive china, as beautiful as the pieces were, didn’t suit Ilona’s non-existent social life, but she would ask Gran tomorrow if she wanted the set. Ilona removed the family photos from the one wall without focusing on the smiling faces. In a few years, then she could chance a proper look. For now, on the dining table they went.

The front doorbell chimed, and she swung it wide open, sliding the delivery man the cash she had taken from Mom’s cookie jar. Her fingers trembled when she tore open the packaging and bit into a sliver of salmon. She groaned and swallowed on a delighted hum. The salty, soft texture of the fish was heaven-sent.

Licking her fingers, she tossed the empty container, then washed her hands in the kitchen sink. A glance at the time drove her out the door. Amity wasn’t too far, just a little past her apartment. She parked in visiting, then strolled through the swing doors with a forced smile when she nodded at nurses and doctors with whom she had done her residency. Her pace was brisk, and she waved with an air of haste, hoping no one stopped her.

She headed for the labs, needing to speak to Evie. As she pushed the glass door open, the cooler temperatures summoned a sigh when it chilled her sweat-dewed skin. Soon she would acclimate to Fenneg’s weather. She rubbed her hands with sanitizer before lunging to the left and right of the aisles, searching for a familiar face.

“Ilona, what are you doing here?” With cornrows and thick bottle-top glasses, her friend beamed, her smile bright against her toffee skin. “Holy shit, girl, your scar looks months old.”

With a wince at the reminder, Ilona tucked her face into Evie’s hair. “Hey, Evie, I need a favor.” She returned the hug, craving it more than she realized. Tightening her arms, she held on for a tad too long. “I suspect my blood is tainted, and I worry I’ll lose it before we can study it.”

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