Page 1 of Agony of Our Regret

ONE

I bent over,fighting back a wince as I tried and failed once again to buckle the strap of my heeled shoe.Light from the floor to ceiling windows overlooking the Chicago morning seemed to mock me with its clear blue skies, all pleasant and cheery.

“Five minutes, babe,” Luca called from somewhere in the apartment.

Five minutes. I mimicked silently. He’d been counting down from the half-hour mark like I’d never managed my time before. Like I'd never gone to an office before. Like I’d never stepped out of this forsaken bedroom before.

Okay. I was a tad on edge.

But his constant reminders grated on my nerves and if I had to stare at these same four gray walls for another day I was going to flip. I appreciated the clean, sleek, modern design of Luca and Gavin’s condo when I first moved in, but now it felt boring and stale.

It was my first day going back to work after taking two weeks to recover from being hit by a stupid car. I’d kept up with my tasks and meetings remotely and finally convinced everyoneincluding Luca and Gavin, their parents, and the rest of our local council that I was fine enough to come back in.

Tessa banned me.

She literally gave the building’s security team my name and badge number. If I attempted to come back early, they would stop me, and my very own team of mother hens would descend and shoo me back to the coop.

Gavin and Luca alternated staying home with me for the first week. Then I told them to go back. I was sore and bruised, but fine. My ability might not have protected me from all injuries, but it kept them from being serious.

Without exposure.

I was quite proud of that.

The Society checked all CCTV angles they could find, and not one showed even a glimmer, not a single little sparkle, coming off me.

I knew I was good, but now everyone else did too.

I gave up on my heels and opted for a pair of slip-on flats.

“Ready?” Gavin appeared in the doorway looking as put together as ever with a fitted shirt tucked into slim tan slacks and his glasses not hiding his amusement. His brown hair was perfectly styled, parted, and combed, and if I could move faster than a weak hobble, I’d mess it up and run.

At least he was prepared with an offering of a bottle of water in one hand and a folded napkin in the other. Lately, the only thing I could keep down in the mornings was a handful of plain crackers.

The morning sickness was why I didn’t fight too much about not going into the office. Finding out I was pregnant seemed to unleash all the symptoms I hadn’t noticed before.

The day after the accident was the first time I got queasy, and no one could convince me it wasn’t because I suddenly knew I was pregnant.

And throwing up constantly with bruised ribs was a kind of pain and misery I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.

“Yeah,” I finally replied, as I picked up my phone off the charger and noted the lack of notifications.

He kissed my cheek and handed me the little breakfast as we entered the living room.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Luca asked for the fifth time today.He too was annoyingly handsome in his custom navy suit. His short blond hair wouldn’t dare be out of place and I wanted to run my fingers through it. They were both too perfect while I felt like a mess held together with tape.

It was difficult enough getting dressed and ready with bruised ribs, but I managed to not look as bad as I felt. The least they could do was have a few wrinkles or mismatched socks to come down to my level.

“Positive,” I assured him after swallowing my first bite. I needed to eat slowly. That was the key to keeping it down.

We went to the elevator together, and I leaned against the wall as it lowered us to the lobby. I nibbled a bit on the crust and watched the two of them.

Something was off.

I’d noticed since I got home from the hospital, but brushed it off as their worry over the accident, the baby, and me.

But they hadn’t settled even as I got better. They were hiding something from me, and I was over waiting patiently for one of them to crack.

“Everything okay?” I asked, taking the lid off my water.

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