Page 4 of One Love

I smile at that and wave my hand when River calls me to sit with her and Petal.

Fucking hell, I hope I don’t have to bond.

Immediately, I’m transported back to a couple of months ago when Hallie, my beautiful, kind, heartbroken Hallie, begged me to go get a manicure with her. Although it was the most excruciating experience of my life—I say this without exaggeration—it is also the most precious memory I have of me and my daughter.

Fuck, I miss her.

Her grandparents called me only a few hours after literally ripping her from my arms after her father’s funeral, telling me that she was safe and better off with them in Florida.

Here’s the thing. In the eyes of the law, I don’t exist. And with the work I do, I cannot exist. Therefore, a legal custody battle is impossible. So, for right now, I’m going to wait it out, choose the right time before I get my daughter back.

Only when the head of the Irish mob is hanging from the proverbial tree will I bring her into my world. Until then, I’ll allow her to stay with her grandparents where I know they’ll keep her safe.

Compromise.

“Oh, J, come sit with us.” Everything in me screams to run as Petal reaches her hand out and motions for me to sit on their outdoor sofas, heat lamps all around. The youngest of her kids is fast asleep against her shoulder, his tiny body wrapped up tight in the cloth that envelops Petal’s entire back and torso.

“Stefano is taking the kids to watch a documentary about bees and honey.” I frown at Petal’s words and their choice of movies. Don’t kids like cartoons? Video games? At least this explains thesudden relative silence falling over us. Honking horns in New York is just background white nose. “Briggs chose it and Everest is all too happy to join them.” Briggs is their first born, probably eight years old by now. Fuck, his birth was like a breath of fresh air for River and Everest. Petal too, obviously, but that’s a story for another time.

“So, I wanted to have you here for Kai’s birthday. You know how important it is for me to keep his memory alive, but also to give you this.” March eleventh…River’s words and her solemn tone make sense. The festivities, the big crowd. River always makes a big deal of today like it’s her way to ask for forgiveness. She hands a small brown box to Petal, a satin green bow on top, and grins from ear to ear.

There’s almost a smile on my own face. I’m curious about what River’s going to announce but I have a feeling I already know. I ignore the warmth in my chest at having been told before Petal, but mostly, I’m honored to be here in this intimate moment between us three women. It’s strange how different we are, how worlds apart our stories began, yet here we are, together, sharing important moments in our lives.

“Oh, you made the box out of wine corks! It’s amazing, I love it so much.” Petal is more engrossed with the rows of corks aligned perfectly to make a box than she is with the actual gift inside. I’m two seconds away from ripping the bow off so we can get on with it and I can go home. “J, that reminds me. You should use witch hazel on your bruises, it helps the blood flow, makes them heal faster. Or Epsom salt in the bath. My mother used to do that all the time, but she only had me so it was easy. With five boys, it’s easier to dab some witch hazel and continue on my way.” She speaks as she pulls the bow free, glancing at me once in a while, her smile perpetually on her lips.

“Will do.” My nod is like a full stop to this entire conversation.

Once the cardboard is pulled back, it takes Petal a second to understand what she’s looking at. But once she does, her squeal is genuine, her happiness palpable.

“Oh my goddess! You’re pregnant?” Tears are immediate between the two women, their arms wrapped around each other wholly in support of one another. It’s some witchy magic that the kid is still asleep. Then again, with the sheer amount of pot Everest smokes, I’m thinking his little swimmers have built-in sleeping pills in their DNA.

“I guess we’ll be going through our pregnancies together.” There’s a brief moment of silence and it takes me a second to realize what Petal is saying.

Holy shit, they’re both pregnant? Six kids? In eight…well, nine years?

My vagina takes this moment to close the door, lock it, and swallow up the key. Definitely not a life for me. For Petal and Everest though, it seems kind of perfect.

“Congratulations to you both. I have to go, need some rest.” Both women look up at me and Petal stands, all barely five feet of her, and places her hands on my cheeks, her eyes mesmerizing and impossible to ignore.

“You’ll find happiness, J. You will, I promise. Grief comes in stages. Breathe them in, take stock in each of those feelings, do not ignore them. The bruises on your body will fade but if you ignore the bruise in your heart, it won’t be able to heal.”

I nod, my jaw tight to avoid any leakage from my eyes. It’s a bad time to be crying. Plus, the salt hurts my cuts.

“I’ll do my best. Thank you.” Attempting a smile, I nod and walk away as the women cuddle up and start talking about babies and clothes. By the time I reach the stairs, I hear blissful silence.

I’m happy for them. Truly, I am. But it all just makes me miss my baby girl.

I say my goodbyes to Stefano, who’s busy caring for the kids and all their foody needs—although I’m sure Everest is eating for four—and head out to my truck when my phone buzzes in my back pocket.

Unknown:How did you survive all those kids?

This motherfucker’s stalker tendencies are starting to piss me off. More concerning than this weird flirting he’s trying to pull off is the fact that he somehow knows what’s going on inside the Mancini mansion. I mean, sure, he did try to help when Murphy and Hallie were kidnapped by giving me their address. And yeah, he gifted me Riley all trussed up and ready to die, but this shit needs to stop.

As always, I forward the message to Glitch without the faintest hope of getting a hit of where or who this guy could possibly be, adding a job for him to do while I’m at it.

Me: Do a security check on the Mancini house for any breaches and fix that shit.

Glitch: On it.

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