Page 35 of My Best Bet

I winced. “You have any tea or coffee? I feel a headache coming on.” I didn’t want any coffee; I just wanted a moment alone with my daughter.

As soon as Mom wandered back to the kitchen, I whispered to Lucy, “Eat quick so we can go, alright?”

Her eyes widened and she immediately put her head down to shovel a huge bite in her mouth.

My chest tightened over how upset she looked when my mom mentioned the party. I felt like I was failing as a parent, but I didn’t know how to fix it. I didn’t know what other advice to give her for making friends.

Stretching back in the chair, I thought for the hundredth time that maybe I needed to start dating again. Maybe then I’d at least have some perspective from a woman other than my mother.

Right on cue, my mind looped back to Mer.

Clenching my jaw, I dropped my fork and tried to breathe deeply to clear my head.

It just wasn’t working.

Every time I tried dating, Mer’s ocean eyes slammed into my brain, making me feel guilty. How was it that even after a decade apart, I still felt like I was cheating on her whenever I talked to another woman? Stella had been the only exception because Iknew what it was with her– we were friends with benefits with no expectations of emotional commitment. That was do-able for me. Because how could I give my all to someone else when Mer still had this hold over me?

Maybe JP was right. Maybe I was stuck.

“What’s the matter Colton?” Mom asked, handing me a mug of tea before offering some to Lucy.

Lucy, who had a bulge of food in her cheek, shook her head.

Mom clucked her tongue. “It’s ‘no, thank you, Grandma Catherine.’ Mind your manners now.”

Lucy’s eyes shifted to mine again, like she was telepathically trying to tell me something.

Mom turned her attention back to me. “What were you about to say, honey?”

“Nothing. Just…” I rubbed my forehead, “thinking that maybe I should start dating again,” I said, testing the idea.

Mom threw her head back and cackled loudly like it was the most ridiculous thing she’d ever heard.

I rubbed my temples, trying to ignore the sting of that reaction.

Lucy twisted her mouth and looked between me and my mother, sensing tension.

“Where did that idea come from?” Mom pet my shoulder.

“I don’t know. Why not?”

She tilted her head, like she was about to lecture me. “You have Lucy and hockey to worry about. You don’t need anything else, honey. And by the way that game went last night, you could probably use a little more focus on hockey.”

I internally groaned.Here it goes.She was about to launch into a recap of every bad move I made last night. Instead of listening, I dipped my head and ate the rest of my brunch as quickly as possible.

“Everything’s going to be okay,” she finally told me. “Just be a little stronger with Lucy, alright?”

I shifted uncomfortably. I hated when she talked about Lucy like she wasn’t right at the table listening.

Lucy made a face at me, then shoved her last bite of food in her mouth.

Before leaving, I hung back in the hall with my mom while Lucy scampered to the foyer to pull her shoes on.

“Mom, you’ve gotta be a little warmer with Lucy,” I said quietly.

“Well, I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she said in a clipped tone, standing straighter and looking me up and down.

“C’mon Mom,” I said lightly. “You were insulting. She likes the nickname Lu, and she was already insecure about her hair.”

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