Page 85 of Naughty Santa Daddy

“Of course, I am, Amos. W-Why do you ask?” I clear my throat and force my lips into a half-smile.

“Well, earlier, in Dad’s office, you didn’t look happy, and then I heard you scream something. Does he make you sad? I don’t want you to be sad, Hadley,” he says in a small voice, wiping the corners of his mouth on his knuckles.

For the second time, this remarkable child has picked up on my feelings when I didn’t want him to. First, he asked about Emillio, and now his dad.

“Come here,” I say, reaching for him and then pulling him up on the couch beside me. I sigh, needing a minute to gather my thoughts. “Sometimes grown-ups have a tough time agreeing on things, and they don’t always get along, but that doesn’t mean they don’t love each other.”Sheesh.I want to gag on the statement as soon as it leaves my mouth, but now I know exactly why it’s used so often when trying to explain stuff to a child. To tell him I am ready to run for the fucking hills because I don’t want to talk about something seems ridiculous, so it’s kind of a safe explanation without directly lying to him.

His eyes glisten, and he clamps his lips together, right before he grins from ear to ear. “You love Dad?”

Shit! That’s what he got from that?

Fuck me.

I open my mouth to lie, glancing around the room for Greta or Emilio. We’re alone, so I decide to answer his question honestly.

“Well, yeah, I guess I do, Amos, but not as much as I love you.” I wrap my arm around his waist, and he snuggles to my side.

“Hadley?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re the best Christmas present,” he admits, looking up at me through his thick lashes. The guilt that plummets into my stomach feels like it outweighs everything else on this earth. I swallow hard. I might want to bolt away from the promisedconversation with Massimo, and yes, I do actually want to get back to work, but how can I leave after that? Only a heartless asshole would walk away… so maybe I won’t be choosing self-preservation after all.

I still plan to get him his damned sled, though. Perhaps it will lessen the blow if something happens to me.

Amos yawns and stretches, straightening his legs out on the couch. He then rests his head on my lap while he curls into a tiny ball, the kind that only kids seem to be able to pull off and still be cute. When an adult does it, it just doesn’t seem as pure. Maybe because when an adult lays like that, people refer to it as the fetal position. Most of the elements of cuteness kind of melt away when I hear it called that.

I peek around the vast room once more, double-checking to make sure we’re still alone.

“Amos?”

“Uh huh?” he mumbles without lifting his head, his eyes transfixed on the enormous, decorated pine in the distance.

My eyes lift from him to the breathtaking Christmas tree as I speak, “Can it be our little secret about me loving your dad?”

“Oh, and all the extra cookies?” I add since we’re on the topic of secret keeping.

“Mmhm. I can do that, Hadley. But you should tell him, and then you can be his best present, too,” Amos states in a small sleepy voice.

I gulp back the tears threatening to break free as my heart silently shatters inside my chest.

“Amos?” I whisper. I can’t let him see me fall apart. He doesn’t answer. Instead, a soft snore is his reply. I manage to keep my breathing somewhat even for a few more minutes until I’m absolutely sure Amos is asleep, and then I break along with my heart. A silent sob finds its way out of my lips, and I cover mymouth with my hand. I know what I need to do, but I’m not sure if I have the strength to do it.

I have no fucking clue what I’m going to do.

Massimo

“Cazzo! Merda! Accideti!”I bark, walking into the shed as soon as my eyes land on the bastard hanging from the chain that binds his wrists together. It’s the same scene as the last time Big John called me to come out here. Without looking at his face, I know his tongue has been removed.

“Why the fuck did I need to be here to see this? His tongue is cut out, right?”

“Yes. Adam hasn’t found the link yet, but they’re from the same crew. I know it.”

“Tell me something we don’t know,stupido,” I snarl, my patience already unbelievably thin from having to leave Hadley so abruptly. We have to talk as soon as I get back. If I can’t trust my men to get me the answers I want, and they clearly have nothing new, then Hadley is going to give me some. I take a deep breath. The information she has might not be any more damn useful than what my men can give me, but I’ll be the one to make that decision.

“He has pictures of her. Lots of them,” Big John admits in a deep voice.

Pure blind rage rips through me and my heart thunders within my chest. “Get him down. Now.”

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