Page 20 of Claiming Veronica

Calia: Uber?

Reed: Did you do that? Wtg!

Me:

I sent another text to Natasha, letting her know I made it, and then, sliding my phone to silent, I headed into my appointment. Unable to help myself, I looked over my shoulder one more time.

The clinic in Phoenix wasn’t one I’d been to before, but they all seemed to have that similar smell of disinfectant. Maxim had arranged for a doctor to see me here, and she had already received my records. I chatted with her a few times via video call to ensure she was familiar with my medical history in case I needed to come in for an appointment while I was in Arizona.

“Just humor me,” Maxim had said.

It turned out that Maxim had been right to want me to be prepared while I was here since it didn’t look like I was heading back in the next few months. Making sure that I had doctors lined up was just smart. Keeping up with a doctor was a mandatory part of my agreement with Maxim and my mother. Even though I wasn’t a fan ofthem butting their noses into my life, I did appreciate their love and support. I knew I was super lucky to have them in my life. Some people didn’t have anyone to help them like I did, but sometimes, it was hard to remember that. The weight of their concern could be suffocating.

The waiting room was like all standard waiting rooms everywhere, with dull landscape paintings designed to be soothing, uncomfortable beige furniture, and a puke-neutral carpet. On the end tables, magazines sat forlornly with address labels carefully cut out. It had always made me wonder where they came from. Who on earth carted them up to a doctor’s office? For that matter, who still got magazines?

Checking myself in, I tucked into a corner of the waiting room onto one of the chairs and double-checked the address for Victor’s lease. I was making that my next stop. It was a little further away, but there was no way I wouldn’t check it out while I had the opportunity. Who knew if Maxim might send someone else, and my chance of independence could be gone as quickly as it came. No, if I were going to check it out, I would have to go today. If there were any hints I could get, I would ferret them out. Right now, things were at a stalemate, and I wanted answers.

“Veronica Pavlova?” Startling, I nearly fumbled my phone when my name was called.

“Yeah, that’s me,” I mumbled, moving towards the nurse. Time to get this show on the road.

Dr. Bennett was thorough, her brow furrowed as she listened to my breathing with her stethoscope.

“Your lungs don’t sound great, Veronica,” she said, pulling back. “Are you using your inhaler and nebulizer?”

I nodded, though it wasn’t entirely true. I hated the reminders of my weaknesses. “It’s been... manageable.”

“Manageable?” She raised an eyebrow. “Describe your cough to me.” She sat back a little, watching me. “Is it productive? Any mucus?”

“Maybe a little. I haven’t seen anything that leads me to think I’m heading toward pneumonia.” I knew that was what she was thinking about. I had pneumonia multiple times and knew what I was looking for, but like her, I was worried about it. Pneumonia led to the ICU and more damage to my lungs. The drugs from the chemotherapy had done more than help get rid of the leukemia, but beggars couldn’t be choosers and all that.

She frowned and sighed, scribbling something on her clipboard. “You need to be more vigilant, especially with your history. The damage to your lungs isn’t going to go away.” She gave me another glare. I wasn’t a toddler, but I cringed a little on the table, making the paper squeak. “Don’t neglect your symptoms.” She tapped her pencil and gave me another critical look that made me squirm. “What about your eating habits?”

“I eat.” That was technically true. Eli’s words from yesterday echoed,“Little Liar.”

“Have you seen a nutritionist?” Pinning the pencil behind an ear, she leaned back in her chair, making me sure she already had the answer to this question.

“I have, actually,” I answered confidently. He is very helpful. I have a complete dietary plan to follow.” This was also technically true. Maxim had set me up with a nutritionist I saw every six months. The guy was an absolute food fanatic, not in a good way. He gave me complicated smoothie recipes that included things like powdered kale.

“That’s good.” For a second, I thought she’d give me an out and leave it alone, but then my hopes were dashed. “But Veronica, your life depends onyou doing everything you can to help your body out.”

“I know,” I said, though my mind was already drifting away and checking out. She wasn’t telling me anything new. This was just old news. Bad news. News I didn’t want to hear. So what? I was dying—big deal. I kept my eyes down, trying to focus on the mystery I was working on. That at least I had a chance of solving.

“Veronica,” Dr. Bennett’s voice softened. “You’ve been doing so well, but I don’t want you to push yourself too hard. If you’re experiencing more difficulty with breathing, you need to tell me. And someone should be with you if possible with your health the way it is.”

I nodded, offering her a tight smile. “I’ll keep that in mind.” Like fuck I would. There wasn’t any reason that I couldn’t be on my own.

“Did you drive today?”

“No,” I lied. “I have a driver downstairs.” Her face immediately relaxed as she went over my labs.

“When is your next oncology appointment?”

“Next month.” I picked a loose strand of my stockings, ignoring the squirming in my belly at the thought of going to the oncologist. I alwaysdreaded the appointments and the possibility of bad news. I might be in remission right now, but reoccurrence could happen anytime. Everyone thought I wasn’t scared of it coming back, that I had made my peace, and that I was brave. They were completely wrong. I was petrified. Just the thought of cancer returning freaked me the fuck out.

“Okay, well, let’s keep touching base through the portal. I want to know if your cough changes or if you have any prolonged episodes.” She frowned as she looked at the images and the reports and closed the files. “I mean it, Veronica.” I managed to nod and smile at her so I could be excused.

The appointment wrapped up quickly after that, and before long, I was back in the parking lot. Taking long breaths that weren’t filled with that icky disinfectant smell.

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