“Did you hear what Travis and his buddies did?”
“The marker on Trent’s forehead? I heard.” Gabe tossed a seashell toward the water like a mini frisbee. “Fucker got off easy, if you ask me.”
“What you did… Gabe, I don’t know how to thank you for taking care of me that night.” Stacey looked down at her hands, pushing her cuticles back with her thumbnails. “I shouldn’t haveput myself in that position, and I feel terrible about everything you had to do to take care of me. I wish I could make that whole night go away. Erase it from everyone’s memories.”
Gabe turned to look at her. “The thing is, Stacey, I’ve never been that afraid in my whole life.”
She could see in his green eyes that it was true. The sound of the waves crashing echoed between them.
He went on. “If Trent had actually hurt you, I think I might have killed him. Part of me wanted to knock on Jessie’s door and teach him a lesson, too, after you told me what happened with him. That much anger scares me. After the party, I was so worried about you and so furious with you at the same time. You got yourself into those situations.”
“I’m so sorry, Gabe. I wish I never put you through any of that.”
He looked back at the water. “Up until this summer, you and me…we always came first with each other. I think I took that for granted. Then something changed. At the concert maybe? I got the sense that the way things had always been between us wasn’t good enough for you anymore.”
Stacey’s stomach knotted. “Our friendship has always mattered to me,” she muttered.
“Then what happened?”
She was terrified of how Gabe might respond, but he deserved the truth. “I wanted you to want to bewithme.”
Gabe nodded and looked at his hands. “I kinda thought so.”
Stacey’s heart sank. “If you hadn’t seen the article in the paper, do you think you would have called me?”
Gabe shrugged. “I really don’t know. Out there in the desert, I’d made peace with the fact that you were different now and we’d grown apart.”
“I’m not different,” Stacey said quietly, reaching over to rub Murphy’s side. “Not really. I don’t want to be the girl I was when I was with Jessie, or at that party, ever again.”
“I see that. When it’s just us, you’re still the old you.” Gabe had dug down to the damp sand, and scooped it into his hands, forming a ball. “I’ve thought about us before, too.” He rolled the ball of sand back and forth between his palms. “About us being TOGETHER, I mean. I’ve thought about it a lot, actually.”
“You have? I was sure you never thought of me like that.”
“Of course I do. We always had fun together. And you’re the kind of person who puts her mind to something and she accomplishes it. Like how one day you just decided you wanted to be a lifeguard. Next thing I knew, you were. I’m sure you’ll get into every college you apply to, and be great at whatever job you have someday. That’s what I love about you, and that’s the kind of person I want to be with. Someday.”
Stacey blushed at the compliment, but braced herself. Something else was coming.
The sand ball cracked in half. Gabe dropped it and wiped the sand from his hands. “I don’t want to be tied to the person I’m going to spend the rest of my life with now. My parents did that. Fell in love in high school and got married way too young. Now they’re talking about separating.”
“Oh, my god, Gabe! I’m so sorry. When did this happen?”
“It’s been coming for a while. I think my dad’s going through a midlife crisis or something. That’s not the point. I’m talking about you and me. We’re kids, and I just want to let myself be a senior, and then in college, without thinking constantly about when I’m getting married or what my girlfriend will think of everything I do.”
“I don’t want that, either.” Stacey said. A large wave crashed and the ground trembled beneath her.
“Don’t you see? Things between you and me are already too intense. If we dated, we’d either break up and I‘d lose you forever, or we’d stay together forever and miss out on being young and free. Either way, it wouldn’t be good for us, not right now.”
Stacey stretched her legs out in front of her and rested back on her elbows, watching the waves. A seagull flew past, dipping down and landing on the water in the distance. “I guess I see that. The chances of us going to the same university are pretty slim. If we’re just friends, the distance will be easier.”
Murphy stood and stretched, then trotted toward a group of dogs surrounding a man with a frisbee.
“That’s the difference between you and me,” Gabe said, standing. He brushed the sand off his shorts then offered Stacey a hand to help her up. “I would never say we are ‘just friends.’”
Stacey took his hand and let him pull her to her feet. “That’s not what I meant.”
They headed back in the direction of their towels, the ice chest, and Murphy, who was chasing the frisbee with a German shepherd and a beagle.
Gabe rested his forearm on Stacey’s shoulder as they walked. “Right now, I ‘just date’ people. But you are one of the most important people in my life. I hope you always will be. I love you, Stacey.”