Page 59 of Losing his Daddy

I shrugged. “You say it like it’s easy. It won’t be. Plus, this place will likely have alcohol at every turn. Oh, god! This place is a nightmare for me. That’s it. I can’t go.”

When I moved to stand, a pair of hands softly pushed me back down. I leaned back to see Byron hovering over me.

“As someone who was prone to panicking before thinking it through, I suggest taking another minute before giving up.”

“It’s odd seeing Byron being the voice of reason,” Doyle fake whispered.

Everyone laughed at the tease, even Byron. I let the ease of the conversation settle my nerves.

Tucker leaned forward. “Let me ask you a question, Gerald.”

“Um, ok?”

“What about the club? Have you given thought to it much?”

I shook my head. “Not really. It’s only come up a few times in all these months.”

“That sounds about right given we haven’t seen Wes at the club. Before, his ex was a hinderance. She wasn’t in the lifestyle, so he would only come out to have drinks every once in a while.I’m talking nearly a year between visits. This from a man who was there almost nightly at one point.”

I stiffened at the thought of him with so many other people. Other submissives who wanted his attention.

Tucker noticed right away. “It’s not what you’re thinking. You’ve never been, which makes it hard to translate. Basically, the club is a place to let down your guard. There is no pretending to hide your kinks in a place like that.”

“I think what Tucker is saying is that Wes could be the Dominant he truly is without shame or worry. We don’t force our kinks onto others. That’s just good manners,” Princess Aster inserted.

“Yes! Thanks, P.A.,” he directed to the other man before turning back to me. “I’m simply stating that for years, Wes suppressed a part of himself. And I worry that he’s doing it again. Not that he needs the club to have an outlet or anything. I can come here when I need to be little and don’t want to do it there. I guess what I’m trying to get at in a long, roundabout way, is that maybe Wes invited you to this as a way to get you used to being out with him. Maybe this is a starting point for him to see if you’ll want to come to the club with him later.”

I closed my eyes as my mind took in his words. Could what he said be true? Was Wes using this party as a way to acclimate me to crowds so that I’d go to the club?

“That still doesn’t fix his problem with the alcohol,” another voice cut in. I turned to follow it.

“Oh shoot,” Princess Aster cried. “We didn’t introduce you to everyone, did we? The guy that just spoke is Xander. His partner Fisher isn’t here.”

“He’s working,” Xander provided.

“Right. He’s working until later. You already know Doyle, Byron, Vaughn, Charlie, and now Tucker. There are more peopleswinging by in a bit too. If you stay, I’ll introduce them like a good host.”

I laughed and shook my head. “You’re doing fine. I wasn’t expecting a full seating chart or anything.”

“That isn’t a bad idea actually. Maybe some cards and photo ids for any newbies to the group.” Charlie muttered the words, then strode toward the kitchen. He started writing notes on a legal pad, which in turn made Princess Aster sigh.

“I love when he gets all organized and stuff. His inner nerd comes out. It’s so hot.”

A few chuckles rose up, though no one gave him flack for loving his husband so much. We were all either thinking of our own someones, or just happy for the pair in general. My thoughts were a mix of both.

“Back to the alcohol issue,” Xander said. I turned to my left to face him. “I’d be willing to bet they have some non-alcoholic beverages available for the night. There are many people in the world like you, and there are also those who simply choose not to partake at all. If you mention it to Wes, I’m sure he’ll help support you.”

I thought of how he’d already been doing so in this journey of mine. Between the verbal support in all our talks and the physical support he’d provided in attending meetings with me, I knew there was truth to what Xander was saying.

“So basically, I need to go to this party and stick to Wes’s side. If all goes well, then maybe down the road I’ll see the club too. By that time, I’m hoping I won’t get this worked up.”

Princess Aster clicked his tongue. “None of that negative talk here. If you do feel overwhelmed and don’t want to talk to Wes about it, we’re always here. If I’m not, then there’s a whole squad of people ready to help you along.”

I smiled at that. Hadn’t I thought of them as a cheerleading squad earlier? How ironic was it that he’d just referred to them as such too?

With a deep breath, I nodded. “Ok, then. I’m going to the party. In the meantime, Tucker, can you tell me more about Club Deny?”

His eyes sparkled. “What all do you want to know?”

---