Page 55 of Losing his Daddy

Gage grinned. “Ah, I see. How recently?”

He didn’t need to specify what he meant.

“A couple of months ago. I’ve honestly lost track of time. Adjusting to a new life is…”

“Difficult,” he finished. “Strange. Wondrous. Frustrating. I’m sure you’ve felt a range of emotions since stepping back into society. That’s normal. I’m glad you found us. We’re happy to have you. This group is really informal. If my clothes and looks weren’t a giveaway, I’ll tell you outright that I'm pretty chill. I want you to want to share, therefore I don’t make anyone participate. We do ask that everything discussed here stays within the group so that we can create a safe space. There’s food that's donated by my buddy Benji over at Whipped.”

“You know Benji?” Wes interrupted.

Gage turned to look at the man beside me. “I do know him. I suspect you and I know him for the same reason.”

Wes gave him an assessing look. “That’s quite possible. If so, then you would also know Patrick and Tucker.”

“And Matteo and Miguel and all the others. Yes, I know them. You are?”

“Weston, but please call me Wes. This is Gerald.”

Something akin to recognition lit his eyes. I wasn’t sure if it was because of Wes’s name or mine. Not that it mattered much. The whole point of this group session was to make myself known. To work through my issues and to find others like me who could lend advice.

“I always tell people that it’s a small world. Even when it happens that I meet someone who knows someone I know, it’s always jarring. Back to the original introduction — you’re welcome to have a seat anywhere you like. Again, we do not force anyone to speak. Let’s keep everything safe and have all the sweets you want, because Benji always sends too much. I would love to chat with you as well if you’re willing to come back. I understand if it’s too much. Here’s my card. Feel free to get in touch whenever.”

He handed over a small business card with blocky letters on it.

Gage Martin

Addiction Recovery Specialist.

It had a phone number, his email and a caricature of his face. I almost laughed at the image because it seemed so out of place. Of course, I knew better than to judge a book by its cover. Gage clearly knew what he was doing. I already felt more at ease than I had when I walked in the door.

We took two of the empty chairs that were left. Wes moved to get me something to eat. I stopped him with a hand on his arm.

“No, let me,” I said.

He shook his head. “This is already a lot for you to handle. Let me take care of you now. We can go right back to it once we’re done here. Focus your attention on what’s to come. Deal?”

I swallowed the lump that had formed at his words. I could hear the concern laced within.

“Sure. That might work.”

His smile was a reward better than any shot of whiskey I’d ever consumed.

As he left, a voice on my right chuckled. I turned to find an older woman beside me. She wore a colorful long dress with flats to match and she had a scarf tied around loosely curled white hair. Her makeup was less bright than the outfit, though not by much.

“You got yourself a sexy big man, huh? Consider yourself lucky. Lock him down and keep him. I missed my chance with Georgie and never got another as good as him.”

I stared at her for a second longer before nodding and turning back to watch Wes. He stood at the table laughing along to something a man in a suit was telling him. I couldn’t hear from where I was, which frustrated me to no end.

There might have been some added tension considering how hungry I was. I hadn’t lied when I said I was too nervous to eat though. It was a delicate balance, these nerves of mine.

It only took Wes another minute or so to make excuses, grab the food, and head back to me. He sat down right as Gage approached the single red chair in the mix.

“We’re about ready to start. If everyone could please find their seat,” he shouted.

The stragglers made their way to fill in the gaps around the circle. Once they were in place, the meeting began. Somehow, it turned out to be the best two hours of my day. And that was saying something given I counted my time with Wes in there.

Gage kept everyone in line with a mix of gentle affection and snappy sarcasm. He regaled stories of how he wound up leading the group, then offered others to share their tales. Person after person spoke about their journey. I felt like they were all tellingmy story too, given how similar some of them were. It was uncanny, really.

I opted not to share since it was my first time. No one called me out about it or judged me for simply listening. When we reached the action steps part of the meeting, Gage was thorough and clear about what needed to be done. He gave us worksheets with instructions on how we could reach our SMART goals, along with a reminder that failing once didn’t mean failing forever.

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