Page 13 of A Sinner's Truth

There’s a desperation in her voice. She really thinks entering into a fake marriage is the answer to her problems. “Well, Aria Swan, I really am sorry, but I can’t marry you—real or fake.”

Her face drops. “Are you already married? Oh god, I just proposed to a married man. Just my luck,” she says. “Forget it. Please. I can’t have word of this conversation getting back to my father.” She goes to stand up.

“Wait! I’m not married. I’m very single actually. But I can’t marry anyone, and you marrying into the De Bellis family is definitely not what you need.” I can’t bring another innocent soul into the dark web that is this bloodline. I won’t have another woman die because of me.

“It can’t be any worse than marrying Oliver Densper,” she says before walking away. I pull my phone out of my pocket and fire off a text to Marcel.

Me:

Find out everything you can about Aria Swan and Oliver Densper.

Marcel:

Why?

Me:

Because I fucking asked nicely, arsehole.

Marcel:

That was you asking nicely? Shit, mate, I’d hate to see how you ask when you’re not being nice.

Sometimes I think little brothers are put on this earth purely to annoy the fuck out of you. I don’t bother replying, because as much shit as Marcel might give me, I know my brother and he’ll have the information to me by morning.

I push off my seat, throw down a hundred-dollar bill, and stride out of the bar. I came here to drown myself in whiskey. And now, after that little encounter with Miss Aria Swan, I don’t feel like drinking myself until I see Shelli tonight.

It’s probably the guilt. I felt something. A spark. A small ember. Whatever it was, it was something for someone who wasn’t my fiancée. And that doesn’t sit well with me.

Opting to walk down the street, I find myself standing outside the bar that Kristen owns. I haven’t seen Shelli’s sister since that day at the cemetery a year ago. I’m not welcomed but I push inside anyway.

She clocks me the moment I sit down. “What are you doing here, Santo?” she asks me.

“I needed someone to remind me of what a shitty human being I am, and I thought you’d be up for the task,” I tell her.

“Why?” Kristen sighs. “What happened?”

“I met someone tonight,” I admit, feeling like I’m going to be sick.

“Okay, I meet people every night. What’s the big deal?” she asks.

“I met a woman. And I didn’t hate her.”

Kristen blinks at me. Once, twice, three times. “Santo, have you not… been with anyone since Shelli?”

My face screws up. “Fuck no, I would never betray her like that.”

“She’s dead, Santo. It’s not betraying her and you really don’t deserve to be putting yourself through all this bullshit. Look, I know you thought the sun shone out of my sister’s ass, but she had her faults too. Shelli wasn’t perfect. You were just too blind or ignorant to see her flaws. You can move on. You should move on,” Kristen says.

“I can’t,” I admit. My sisters-in-law are champing at the bit to set me up on dates, to have me get back out into the world. Well, all of them except Cammi. My brothers are married, living their best lives. Even the youngest of us. Vin just got hitched. Cammi’s secretly my favourite. I love all of my new sisters, but Cammi is different.

I don’t know what it is about her, or if it’s just what she does for Vin. She helps him more than she realises. The way she loves him is unique, their connection like something I’ve never seen before. I loved Shelli—IloveShelli. But even I can see that we didn’t have the kind of love that Vin and Cammi have.

“I love her,” I tell Kristen. “I can’t betray her by moving on.”

“I know you love her, but she’s not coming back, Santo. Nothing is going to bring her back and you’re still reasonably young. You should be living your life. Shelli wouldn’t want youwasting away.” Kristen turns around and picks up a bottle of Cinque before sitting a glass in front of me. She fills it to the brim, then slides it closer. “What you and Shelli had isn’t going anywhere. If you move on, it will always be a part of you. She will always be a part of you. And despite what you like to try to put out to the world, you have a big heart and there is room for another love in there.”

Even if Kristen’s right, I don’t want it. I will not make myself that vulnerable again. It’s not better to have loved and lost. It fucking sucks. I wish I’d never fallen in love at all.

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