Page 68 of Vegas Baby

Shock kept her immobilized as the ultra sound technician wheeled her cart into the room. She spoke in a soft, soothing voice but Raina never once looked at her. The spot on the wall was the only thing stable in her world and she clung to it like a lifeline. Throughout a series of questions, Raina kept her replies short while inside she wanted to scream. She listened to the woman with a sense of suspended disbelief mingled with horror.

Another small cramp rippled down her legs and she sucked in a sharp breath. A firm hand settled on her shoulder and she resisted the urge to turn her head, to seek comfort from Howler while the chasm in her heart cracked wider.

Raina couldn’t look at him, knowing she was losing him. Or you can simply tell him how you feel. Every single word cut deep into her soul, but she’d say them first. Keep him on the defensive to safeguard your own heart. I love you was on the tip of her tongue, but she bit it back. Even saying that was in violation of the contract, a bullet point she’d put in, but he hadn’t objected to.

Except she deluded herself into believing there was more between them than sex. Hysterical laughter bubbled up and she shook her head, unable to stomach this endless loop of regrets.

Time to call it quits and pick up the pieces of her life, without Howler.

There was only one problem, how to fill the empty void in her soul.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

“How the hell is that possible?” Howler stared at the doctor, mouth agape before he snapped his jaw shut. He squeezed Raina’s shoulder where his hand still rested but she stared straight ahead, not reacting.

“Vanishing twin syndrome happens in about thirty-five percent of pregnancies with two gestations before week twelve. You’re approximately eleven weeks. One twin will abort but the other is still viable. I don’t have an answer to why, but I do know your wife is still pregnant.”

For the first time since they’d entered the room, Raina turned her head and looked at the doctor. “What are the odds I’ll lose this one as well?”

The doctor removed her rubber gloves and threw them into the trash can. She raised the bed until Raina was in a sitting position. “There’s always a chance but that’s something I can’t answer for you. There are no physical ramifications after the miscarriage but expect emotional ones. It’s hard for some women to reconcile the fact they lost one fetus but are still carrying a second. Since the bleeding stopped, you can go about your normal routine. Please follow up with your regular doctor as soon as possible.” The doctor gave her a small smile before leaving the room.

“Thank you,” Howler said, moving to Raina’s side and clasping her hand.

She snatched her hand from beneath his and placed her legs over the side of the bed. “I’m ready to leave. Can you call Trent? I want to go home.”

He frowned, alarmed by the near-robotic sound of her voice. Granted, she was in shock, but this was more than that. “Trent is in the lobby. I’ll take you home.”

She shook her head. “No, I want Trent to take me back to the condo.”

“I know this has been difficult but let me take you home. We’ll go see Dr. Lopez tomorrow and—”

“No, I can’t do this anymore. I can’t stay married to you.”

His stomach plummeted to his feet. “You’re still pregnant, the contract is still in effect.”

She snapped her head around, red-rimmed eyes boring into him. “Screw the contract Howler. I hate that stupid contract. I wish I would have never signed it. I can’t do it anymore, I can’t.”

“Raina, please calm down. Let’s talk about this tomorrow. You’re exhausted, and you need some sleep. Let me take you home and—”

“—Yes, I’m exhausted and yes, I’m tired as hell but I’ve never been clearer about what I want and it’s not this farce of a marriage. I can’t do it anymore. I thought I could, but I can’t. I just can’t.”

The accusation in her tone cut deep and he clenched and unclenched his fists, trying to get a handle on his own rising temper. “We made a deal and I’ve stuck to my part of the deal. The contract’s not only about what you want, Raina. It’s my baby too and I don’t want to be a part time dad.” Or a part time husband.

“Well guess what, I haven’t. I…I broke the contract.”

He ran his hand through his hair, mentally skimming through every clause in the contract and settled on two possibilities. Coldness descended, and his confusion turned to fury. “Did you have an affair?”

Raina shook her head, tears streaming down her cheeks. She raised shaking fingers to her mouth, curled her legs into her chest, and shifted her gaze to the spot on the wall. “No, I didn’t have an affair. But I did fall in love.”

Dizziness washed over him, and he planted his feet firmly on the ground, trying to keep his equilibrium, except standing still felt wrong. “Who is he?” he asked, the words torn from his throat as he began to pace. She was in love with another man, a blow to the solar plexus. Was it Trent? He claimed to be gay, but he’d been married to a woman. Or perhaps someone at work? She worked almost exclusively with men. Betrayal turned his stomach and he wanted to turn around, to walk out but this was his marriage, his life. His wife.

Staring at her bent head, he tapped his foot on the floor, needing an outlet for the nervous energy surging through his body. Was he being stupid like David and letting his love for her grow into an obsession? If she didn’t want to be with him, he couldn’t force her, nor did he wish to be with someone who didn’t feel the same way about him.

“It doesn’t matter. It’s over between us. I can’t stay married to you. When—I’m sorry, I can’t. I promised, and I broke the promise.” She began to sob, harsh gut-wrenching sobs.

Fisting his hands, he gritted his teeth until his temples throbbed. Only once in his life had he ever experienced this much pain, this much betrayal. Unlike his mother, Raina was alive and sitting before him, but she was unobtainable. Bile burned his throat and he felt physically ill. She’d betrayed him and for the past month, they’d been living a lie. “It matters to me. You owe me the truth.”

Silence stretched between them, the beep of some machine in the distance ticking off the time. Growling in frustration, he cupped her chin until she raised swollen eyes to his. “You owe me the truth, Raina.”

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