Page 76 of In the Dust

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Well, I’m going to New York.

I wake with a pounding headache. It feels as if there’s two little men playing tennis with my brain, throwing it back and forth and hitting it with all their might.

Colton, ever the gentleman, tucked me in last night but didn’t stay. He said he wanted to wake up early to pack even though our flight isn’t till seven in the evening. It’s a short flight if there aren’t any delays.

I still have so many reservations about going on this trip. I know he’s excited; he couldn’t stop talking about it on the way home from the bar. I tried telling him multiple times that I wasn’t going, but I think he thought I was just being dramatic.

I walk into the kitchen to find the two men I should talk to about this to sitting at the table. Grandpa is reading the newspaper while Dad is scrolling through his phone, eating a bowl of Cheerios.

There’s no better way to start this conversation than to just dive right in. “Colton wants to take me to New York … tonight.” I clear my throat. “For a few days.”

Dad looks up from his phone. “That’s great, kiddo.”

He sounds genuinely happy about it, and I wish I had his enthusiasm. I set my steaming cup of coffee on the table and pull out a chair.

“I don’t want to go.”

“I think you should,” Grandpa says sternly

“I can’t leave right now. Y’all need me.” I take a sip of my drink, relishing the warmth it brings me. “I left New York to help here. I don’t need to go back.”

Dad shakes his head. “I have the next few days off. The station wanted those of us that were on the frontlines to recoup.”

“Even more reason to stay.” I miss him. I feel like I’ve hardly seen him since I’ve been home.

“We’ll be fine,” he says as he gets up to put his bowl in the sink. He walks over to me and places a gentle kiss on the top of my head. “I gotta check the stables, but I agree with Pops. You should go.” Before I can protest, he’s already walking out the door.

“But you hate New York!”

He stops before closing the door, turning his head back. He isn’t a man who lays his emotions on the table, but this time he does. “I hated you living there, Dixie. But I supported it, and I’ll support anything you do. But you’re back, so I don’t hate it anymore since now when you go, it’s just to visit. So go and enjoy a few days of freedom without worry.”

When he closes the door, I turn to Grandpa. “Honey, you need a little vacation after everything that’s happened,” he tells me.

“I need to be here.”

“Stop being so hardheaded.”

“I’m being realistic.”

“I think the change of scenery will do you some good.”

I ponder his statement for a few moments while I finish my coffee. He’s right, as usual. I was hoping they would give me the excuse I needed to not go, but here we are.

“Fine, but if you need me—”

He holds his hand up to stop me. “We’ll be fine, Dixie.”

He has this look on his face that tells me I’d better bite my tongue.

“Go pack. Just come say goodbye before you leave.”

“I could never leave without saying bye.”

* * *

I never inmy life have seen Colton Payne scared of anything. When I was seven and a snake slithered my way, I screamed. Colton rushed over like a knight, grabbing it carefully to lead it away.

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