Page 42 of In the Dust

He pauses for a brief moment. “You drove away from me.”

“I came back.” I sneer. “I came back to find your arms already around another girl on the worst day of my entire life, Colton.”

His eyes are restless, jutting back and forth. “I’m so sorry, Dix. I was so mad at you for leaving me.”

My mind drifts back to that horrible night, and Colton pauses to let me remember.

We were standing on the stage together, graduating high school. Everyone was so proud, and our whole lives were ahead of us. We had a simple plan, just like my mom and dad. To graduate, get married, have some babies, and run the farm.

Graduation caps still on, gowns wrapped around our bodies, we walked into the hospital to show my Momma. She was withering away, the chemo taking every ounce of her strength. Her wrinkled hand wrapped around mine.

It looked like she had aged ten years in six months.

“I can’t …” I cry, drowning back to reality. I associate him with the hurt, with the pain.

He slams his fist into the barn door. The wood rattles. “You are everywhere in this town. Because I can't let you go and trust me, I've tried.” He laughs. “Have I fucking tried.”

“I’ve gotta go,” I whisper.

The rage seeps off him as he looks to the sky. Then, he tips his head, “Go, then.” He takes a step toward me, and I don’t back away.

“Fine.” I step to him. We’re dangerously close now,

“Fine,” he replies, his lips a feather away.

A bolt of lightning cracks through the sky, illuminating his face, his eyes, his heart.

He presses his forehead against mine, “I’m here, Dixie.” He’s pleading with me with his words. “I’m gasping for you, running out of air. Trying to breathe in the space you left behind, but you've gone too far away, and you took my only source of oxygen when you left. I’m running out of air without you. Come back to me, baby. Don’t leave me in the dust again.”

“I don't belong here.” I don't know where I belong.

“If your life is so much better in the city. It is what it is, I guess.” He deflates.

“I hate it there; I’ve hated it since I left. No friends, no future, I don’t see myself growin’ old there.” I roll my head back as I spill the truth, letting the trickles of water wash over me. “I don’t know what I want!”

As the wind sweeps past our faces, while the raindrops soak us, Colton Payne pulls my face into his, choosing for me.

“Me,” he breathes, bringing his lips to mine. “It’s me you want.”

His touch is so familiar, his taste. I could pull the taste of his lips from a line up, so comfortable, so full of everything.

He’s always been my home, and that’s why New York never felt quite right. Why nothing has felt right since I left.

I ran away from him, and now our bodies are where they’re supposed to be; together.

But we fight. Hell, do we fight. I pull my lips from his. “We don’t mix, Colton Payne. Only fire will come from this.” I gesture between us.

His calloused hands run through my soaked hair, fresh rain dripping in to mix with our dancing tongues. “Let it fucking burn, darlin’.” The thunder roars, imitating the explosion between us.

I wrap my legs around him as he picks me up, slamming my body against the barn door. We’re soaked, panting, pawing at one another.

We slip inside the stables, and between the heated passion on the way to the hay bed, we peek our heads over the stable door, where Pixie and her baby are sleeping peacefully.

We lock lips again, walking to the back of the barn.

Colton lays a soft blanket down to protect my back from the scratchy hay. In one swift movement, he slides his hand to my back, supporting me as he lays me down.

“I’ve missed you,” he admits, his tone filled with years lost.

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