Page 28 of Trust Me With Forever

But now, I could do some good here. The passion to teach stirred to life inside me. More than that, I wanted to be a version of myself I actually liked. Not one who moped and hid and scrambled to deal with her past mistakes.

A new name would make it easier to try and be that version of me.

“I think I’ll be Abigail Mendoza, if that’s all right with you.”

His hands went to my waist and squeezed. My eyes shot to his, and something stirred in Rafe’s gaze, something I couldn’t name.

His voice was low as he said, “I like it. A lot. Mrs. Mendoza.”

As a little girl, I’d created Barbie weddings with me and Rafe. But it’d been a child’s fantasy of platonic kisses and setting up house and us moving around the world as Rafe played soccer.

But as an adult? Hearing Rafe call me Mrs. Mendoza sent a shiver down my spine, in a good way. “Well then, Mr. Mendoza, are you going to show me around my office now?”

And maybe we could celebrate my new job with me sitting on a desk while you kneel before me, spreading my legs, and then…

Interrupting my dirty thoughts, Rafe guided me into the room. It was empty of furniture, and I tried not to be disappointed.

Not that Rafe would go down on me at any point in our marriage. However, it still felt like my fantasy would always be for that to happen.

He said, “I didn’t want to decorate it for whoever took the position since I don’t know what the hell you’ll need. But you can decorate it however you want. Even if you want to hang up ‘I heart Rafe’ posters, I’ll make sure they’re made.”

I rolled my eyes. “Ego, much?”

“I was voted the best striker in the world one year.”

“Were you? Hmm. I must’ve missed that.”

I hadn’t, but it was entirely too much fun to tease Rafe.

He said, “It’s easy to tell when you’re lying, Abigail. You knew. You followed my career.”

“Maybe for a while. But eventually, I got too busy.”

I waited to see if he’d call me out again because I had followed him up until he’d retired. Even when he’d hurt my best friend, I hadn’t been able to completely forget about Rafe. At first, right after his parents died, I kept looking to see if he was sad or hurting or miserable. But trying to gauge emotions through a screen, while he played an intense game, hadn’t worked.

His breath danced across my ear again. “I’ll make sure you get a packet with all the necessary information about me and my career. Because the students will ask about it, and you should know.”

“Wait, I have to take a Rafe Mendoza 101 class now?”

He chuckled, and the sound made me want to lean back against him and feel the vibrations of his chest.

Woah. Get a grip, Abby.

He said, “Something like that. Although you’ll have to create an Abby Wolfe Mendoza 101 class for me, too. I need to know as much as possible about my wife.”

His hand moved from my shoulders, down my sides, and settled on my waist. For a second, I held my breath, waiting to see if he’d pull me against him.

But after a few beats, he dropped his hands and stepped away. His voice sounded rough as he said, “I have some work to do. But look around and let me know what you need.”

With that, he left. As soon as the door clicked closed, I let out a breath and rubbed my hands over my face. Being alone with Rafe had already become dangerous, and I’d only agreed to stay married to him yesterday.

Dropping my hands, I glanced around the room. Once we figured out the basics of how we’d act as a couple, this place would become my focus, my distraction.

Because Rafe would never really be mine, and becoming a workaholic would distract me from wishing he could be.

Chapter Twelve

Abby

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