Page 66 of Power and Possession

His eyes met mine directly, and I could read so many expressions on his face. Lust, determination, need…and disappointment.

“I won’t rush you, Ashlynn. You know how I feel. I’ve never wanted something as bad as I want you. I’m used to taking whatever I want, possessing the unpossessable—but you, my darling girl, will be worth the wait.”

I looked away, my emotions raw. His confessions managed to get underneath my skin and fester, like a rough splinter. One day I wouldn’t be able to remove them without carving out chunks of myself.

Thankfully Steele changed the subject, most likely sensing my unease. “Shall we go for a walk?”

“Are you up for it?” I appraised him. His color had returned, and his eye was no longer swollen shut. The wounds on his chest were still significant, and I knew he’d carry the scars forever. His front now matched his back, and I felt pain every time I looked at it. I loved his chest, loved to run my fingers up and down his strong pectoral muscles. But now I only felt guilt.

“I’m always up for it.”

His double meaning didn’t escape my notice, but I ignored it. I moved closer to him, holding out my arm so I could support him, but instead, he pulled me tightly into his chest. I could feel his heartbeat, feel his chest move up and down with his labored breathing.

We walked down the stairs, one step at a time. Steele needed my help, but every time he reached for me it felt more and more intimate. A hand on my back. His arm on my shoulder. His thigh grazing mine. By the time we got down the stairs, I was gasping, and not from the exertion.

“I want to show you something,” he said, turning towards his office. We moved slowly down the hall, and then I helped him inside.

A white box sat on his desk, with a large blue bow wrapped prettily around it.

Steele sat down behind his desk, grunting softly through the discomfort.

“Glinda wrapped it,” he said, nodding towards the package.

It was too big to be jewelry, and I was thankful for that. I hadn’t seen the pink diamond engagement ring since before my father sent his men to retrieve me. I’d taken it off when I showered, and left it on the countertop, but it wasn’t there when I returned. Steele never mentioned it again, and I wasn’t sure what happened to it. But this box was much bigger.

“Open it,” he encouraged.

I undid the bow and lifted the lid, and then smiled.

A Nikon Z8 camera was wrapped in the tissue paper.

Steele knew me better than anyone.

“This is way too expensive,” I said, picking it up carefully.

“Nothing is too expensive for my baby.”

I looked at him, watched him drum his fingers on the wooden desk, his eyes unflinching as he watched me.

“I can’t—”

“Just take it and say thank you.”

I mumbled my thanks, already fiddling with the buttons.

“You can bring it on our walk,” he suggested, and I helped him to his feet.

We moved outside and onto the grounds. The snow started to fall, and it blanketed his estate.

Steele tired easily, and he decided to sit just in front of the large outdoor fireplace. I could feel his eyes on me as I played around with my new camera, taking pictures of the snow and the trees. I tried different angles, messed around with all the features, truly enjoying myself.

After an hour, I came back to Steele. “Aren’t you bored?”

He bit his bottom lip. “I haven’t been bored since the day I met you, Ash.”

Another week went by, and Steele and I coexisted peacefully. He got stronger every day, but we didn’t sleep together. We cuddled and watched TV together at night, and he watched me as I wandered around the estate, stalking wildlife and finding beauty through the lens of my camera.

He didn’t bring up our relationship again, and neither did I. I pushed the conversation away, simply enjoying the small pleasures in life. I didn’t know how long we could keep up this limbo period, but I didn’t want to rock the boat.

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