Page 116 of My Best Years

The tightness in my chest only grows more tense as I wait for Callum to walk out of the clinic. He’s been in there for close to an hour now.

I can’t help but feel like if everything was okay, he would be out by now.

Maybe it’s just taking a while to get through all the test results.

Dr. Sharpe might just be behind today and is just now seeing Callum.

I close my eyes and try to steady my breathing.

God, I wish I was with him right now.

When I asked Callum if he wanted me to go inside with him, he said he preferred to hear the news alone but wanted me here when he got out. As a nurse, I completely understand his decision.

Some patients feel comforted by having loved ones in theroom with them, and for others, it only heightens their anxiety. The burden of how a diagnosis will impact friends or family can be debilitating for patients, which only adds to their stress levels. They would rather share their diagnosis with loved ones in a personal and intimate way rather than in the confines of a cold, fluorescent room.

After half an hour of fidgeting with anything my hands could touch, I decided to call Winnie. I had to do something, or I was going to drive myself insane with thoughts of the worst.

“Do Mom and Dad know you’re living with Callum?” Winnie asks, pulling me from my thoughts. “They are going to shit their pants when they find out.”

“No,” I clip. “And I will disown you if you tell them before I have a chance to,” I add, half-jokingly. “Plus, we’re not technicallylivingtogether. He’s just…giving me a place to stay until I finish my contract.”

“Bullshit”, she scoffs. “You’re sleeping in his bed, Birdie. Using his shower. Grocery shopping together. You are one thousand percent living together.”

I roll my eyes, even though I know she can’t see the gesture.

“Again,” I exhale. “It’s only for one month, Win.”

Hopefully, much longer,I think to myself. An eternity with Callum wouldn't be long enough.

“We’ll see about that,” Winnie retorts. “You two will be married by the end of next year. I’m calling it right now.”

Winnie’s voice is drowned out by a rolling boom sounding from the cloudy sky. Even though it’s the middle of the day, it looks almost pitch black outside. A streak of lightning slashes through the air as heavy sheets of rain begin to pound against the car windows.

“What the hell is that noise? Is everything okay?” Winnie asks.

Oh my God.

My phone nearly slips from my fingers when I see Callum walk out of the clinic. Rain splatters against his sculpted face as he trudges through puddles on the pavement, keeping his head down.

Shit.

He looks…distraught.

No…No, no, no.

Stop thinking like that.

He’s just keeping his head down to avoid the rain.

Everything is fine. Everything is okay.

“Helloooo?” Winnie drags out.

“It’s just a thunderstorm,” I respond, never taking my eyes off Callum. I haven’t told her about Callum’s appointment, so she thinks I’m on my lunch break right now.

“I uh… I better get back inside and clock in before the weather gets too bad,” I shout over the rain thudding against the car. “I’ll call you back tonight. Love you,” I rush out before abruptly ending the call.

When I drop my phone to my lap, it immediately starts to vibrate against my leg. I’m sure it’s Winnie calling me back to bitch about me hanging up on her.