Page 28 of My Best Years

She definitely doesn't notice that I’m parked in the front, near the entrance. Instead, she’s looking down, checking her phone while walking to her car.

She’s wearing a pair of light pink scrubs, her sandy hair hanging over her shoulder in a loose braid. Never in my life would I have thought I’d be attracted to scrubs, but I would happily pay to see Birdie in a pair of every color.

She’s so fucking stunning, and she doesn't even know it. She has no idea how effortlessly beautiful she is.

She tucks a loose strand of hair behind her ear, looking completely exhausted. From what I read online, most nurseswork ten to twelve hours a day. Twelve hours on their feet with minimal breaks. That has to be miserable.

It takes a special person to work in healthcare, which is how I know Birdie is the best at her job. She’s the most selfless person I know.

I’m so distracted and in awe by the mere sight of her that I almost forget to step out of my car when Birdie walks by. She strolls past, only a few steps behind my bumper, before I throw my door open and rush to her.

“Birdie,” I call out, loud enough for her to hear me but low enough not to startle her.

Birdie’s back is to me, and the second her name leaves my lips, her entire body goes eerily still. It’s clear she instantly knows it's me from the sound of my voice alone.

Or maybe she can feel my presence like I felt hers in the grocery store. Even after eleven years, I knew that she was near.

My pulse skyrockets as she slowly turns around, squaring her shoulders to face me and narrowing her steel gray eyes to angry slits.

I anxiously prepare for her words, like waiting for the loud boom of a gunshot.

“What the hell are you doing here, Callum?” she fumes in a low, furious tone.

I carefully hold an arm out to her like someone trying to calm a scared puppy, staring at her through wide eyes.

“Birdie,” I plead. “I just need two minutes. I need to talk to you.”

When I confronted her a couple of days ago, she tried to keep herself calm and collected before she lost her shit on me. However, that’s not going to be the case tonight. From the furious look on her face, she’s about ready to fucking kill me.

I swallow thickly, steeling myself for her onslaught.

Before I can blink, she drops her bag to the asphalt and stomps up to me until her face is only inches away.

Her nostrils flare as her eyes dart between mine.

“Who the fuck do you think I am?”she shouts at the top of her lungs while tossing her arms up in the air. “Your goddamn therapist? Find someone else to unpack your guilt with because it’s not going to be me, Callum! I’m not talking to you about shit. I don’t know how to make it more clear—I havenothingto say to you!”

Like a dull knife, every word cuts deeper and deeper. But instead of putting me out of my misery, the wound never quite reaches the bone. The pain just keeps coming without end.

I knew if I ever saw Birdie again, she would be upset with me. But I didn’t think she could get this angry. I didn’t know she had it in her. She’s always been so soft-spoken and gentle. But finally, she’s giving me the lashing that’s well overdue.

Even though I don’t deserve a second of her time, I have to push back. If I don’t, I risk losing her forever. This might be my only chance to explain what happened. I straighten my shoulders and try to mask the hurt in my eyes.

“Well, I have something to say to you,” I retort, not backing down. “I need toexplainsomething to you,” I clarify when she arches a threatening brow.

Too astonished to speak, Birdie shakes her head and huffs out a loud breath. I take her pause as an opportunity to begin telling her what I should have said years ago.

“That night…” I trail off. “Birdie, our last night together was the most special and memorable night of my life. Me leaving had nothing to do with you–”

“No,” she cuts me off through clenched teeth as her eyes brim with unshed tears. “Don’t you dare tell me that it wasn't about me. You were my best friend, the only person—besides my sister—who knew me to my core. You were my first love. Igave you all of me. All my firsts. And the next day, you fucking abandoned me. You didn’t even have the decency to call or send me a single text. You left me behind like a toy you got bored of. Do you know what that does to a person? Do you understand how bad that hurt when you were my entire world? You leaving me was themost excruciatingexperience of my life. So you don’t get to tell me it wasn’t about me.”

A tear drips from her lashes as she lets out the breath she was holding in, and I so badly want to swipe it away with my thumb. I wish I could take it all away. If only I knew what I know now. But I was eighteen and scared, terrified of putting the only person I loved in danger.

“You don’t understand,” I shake my head. “You wereeverythingto me. That’s why I stayed away from you. Still, to this day, I have never loved anyone the way I loved you, Birdie. Never.”

Her brows shoot up, her mouth hanging open in shock before she chuckles sarcastically.

“Don’t give me that bullshit, Callum,” she scoffs.

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