Page 55 of Daughters of Chaos

“It’s just,” he starts, “the other night. Me and that girl—”

He runs a hand through his hair in frustration. “I don’t want you to be mad. It didn’t mean anything.”

I shrug, growing more irritated with the conversation the longer it continues. “It’s no big deal, J. Really. I’m not mad at you for it. I told you to go with her.”

A short huff breezes from his mouth as he leans against the bar. “I know, but afterward, I thought about it. Thought maybe you were testing me, and I failed. I feel like I fucked up my chance with you.”

Damn it.

My eyes close tight as I try to steel myself for what I need to say. When they open, I set down the glass I'm drying, turning to Jesse. “I don’t do that shit, Jesse. If I didn’t want you to go upstairs with her, I wouldn’t have told you to do it.”

He takes a minute to let my words sink in before he says, “So what does that mean for us?”

With a sigh, I look him in the face. “It means, if the mood strikes, we can keep having fun, but that’s it. I’m not the relationship type, J. I need you to be on board with that.”

For a second, he lets the sting of my rejection show in his eyes, but it vanishes before it can settle anywhere deep. “Sooo, we’re good?” he asks with a half-smile.

My lips quirk as I nod. “We’re good.”

Jesse lets out a relieved chuckle as he pulls me into an obnoxious embrace, and the tension melts from his bones. “Fuck yeah, I knew there was a reason I liked you.”

As he lets me go, I hold up a hand, pointing at him with one finger. “So we’re clear, before you and I have any morefun,I need to see a clean sheet from Doc. Our trysts don’t need to come with nasty little surprises.”

He laughs, nodding in agreement.

When our eyes meet, there's a wave of understanding. If our casual hookups continue at all, they'll be few and far between. His gaze holds no glimmer of sadness at the fact; if anything, there's a hint of relief. What we have to offer each other is more than a temporary good time. Friendship is funny that way.

With a knowing nod, he extends his fist. I meet it with my own, giving him a soft smile. A silent agreement. A promise to never ask one another for more than we're willing to give. Our friendship, our bond, is more important than any short-lived euphoria anyway. And we're both okay with that.

When we look away, I find someone watching us with narrowed eyes and pursed lips. Reaper. I bury my growl and go back to work.Nosey mother fucker.

The door opens, welcoming a group of women who step into the dark interior, banding together as if someone might steal one of them away. Jesse grins at them, coaxing them closer until they relax enough to take up the empty seats at his end of the bar.

I zone out, ignoring them as I continue drying the now-clean glassware. With Jesse entertaining the customers, I can work without interruption. Or so I think.

A gruff voice cuts through my solitude, jerking me into the present. “So, you two are done.” A statement, not a question.

My brows furrow as I look up, finding Reaper studying me. The usual retort wrapped in smart-assed sarcasm isn’t whatleaves my lips as I reply, “There was never anything to bedonewith.”

There's something curious in his gaze as he watches me. It's unnerving. “What’s it to you anyway?” I ask, not bothering to keep the irritation from my voice.

Reaper shakes his head, spearing me with a sharp stare. “It’s not.”

Before I can say anything, he stands and moves to a table far from the bar, joining some of the guys from the MC. I roll my eyes and wipe down the bar top, ignoring the table at the other end of the building.

When I check the room a while later, a pair of dark eyes are once again trained on me. I don’t give him the satisfaction of looking away first. It's a dare, a quiet challenge, and neither of us wants to lose.

31

Phoenix

When Kat texted on Saturday to cancel the double date I'd roped Mason into going on, I didn't think anything of it. When she didn’t show up for classes on Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday and stopped responding to my texts, I started to worry. A pit formed in the bottom of my stomach and not even reassurances from Martin loosened the feeling of dread inside me.

It's unlike her to disappear without warning. In the past, if she’d be gone for a day, she’d at least text me and let me know so I could grab her assignments for her. With finals next week, something about this feels very, very wrong.

The rational part of me says to listen to Martin when he says not to worry. She’s on vacation with her family and must have forgotten to mention it, but Kat was so focused on school and on getting her degree. She gave up so much to put her educationfirst. It doesn’t make sense that she’d leave for vacation this close to the biggest tests of the semester.

The pit in my stomach kept triggering the irrational part of my mind, telling me her absence had something to do with the MC war somehow. That her friendship with me has somehow made her a target, but that can’t be right, can it?

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