Page 82 of One Bed

‘I know you want me to open up, to be emotionally accessible, to talk about my past…’ He looked up at the ceiling. ‘I’m trying, Bea.’

She frowned. ‘I don’t understand.’

‘Look, I had a very complicated relationship with my mom, and with my dad, I guess. She wanted everything from me, all the time. With her, I felt like I was an experiment. She was a professor of psychology in Berlin before she married my dad, and there were no boundaries in our family. She was relentless in wanting to know everything about me, all the time. As a kid, I learned to shut down, and to protect my thoughts and my privacy.’

She could see him struggling to find the right words and she put her hand on his cheek. ‘Gib…’

‘I’ve been working with a therapist, in person and online trying to get past that, to break that habit,’ Gib told her, his voice ragged. ‘I want to talk to you about it, tell you what happened, how it shaped me, but I don’t know how. Not yet, anyway.’

Just the fact that he was trying, that he’d gone to the effort of doing that made her heart sing. Maybe he was only doing it for her, but she knew getting professional help would benefit Gib in the long run. How could it not?

‘I so appreciate that, Gib. Thank you. I know it can’t be easy.’

He winced. ‘Setting my hair on fire would be more fun,’ he told her. Then he shrugged. ‘But if it can help me work through some shit, make our relationship richer, bring us closer, then I’m up for it. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you, Bea-baby.’

Her heart did a zoom around her body. God, this man. He waseverything.

He pushed his hand into her hair. ‘I’ve decided to cut down on my travelling and to trust my expensive, very smart VPs a little more. You can work anywhere, and to an extent, so can I. I know London is home for you, and Golly is, mostly, there, but maybe we can split our time between London and Nashville. And spend our summers here, on Santorini. Maybe you can travel with me occasionally.’

Bea held up her hand, palm facing him. ‘Whoa, hold on. I’m trying to make sense of this… Are you saying that youwantus to be together?’

‘This weekend, getting everyone here, was my idea. I wanted to surprise you.’ He raked a shaking hand through his hair. ‘And, yes, I want us to be together. I’ve been fuckingdesolatewithout you.’

Bea saw the anguish in his eyes and noticed that he looked drawn and gaunt, and not half as confident as he usually did. He looked like he said he felt: dejected. It was weird to see him so expressive. Before, he always seemed to be in complete command of himself and his emotions.

He didn’t look like the successful businessman, the charismatic CEO she met on the road two months ago. He looked like a man who was in love, someone who had no place to put his love. He wanted her and that made her feel feminine and fantastic, powerful and potent. But would it last? She was just a normal, rather average woman who spent most of her time in the make-believe world populated by an unruly gang of pre-teens, someone who was only adventurous when she tossed black letters onto a white screen. He was hero material, she was the woman who went to work in yoga pants and slippers, her hair in a messy bun, glasses on her nose.

‘OK, I’m dying here,’ Gib said, his voice shaking. ‘I’ve just told you that I’m crazy about you, but you’re just sitting there looking like I smacked you with a two-by-four. Have you changed your mind about me and what you want?’

The two-by-four comment was a pretty accurate analogy, actually. She did feel like he’d knocked her off her feet.

‘Acceptable responses are… “I missed you too”, or “I want to be with you, too”. The perfect response would be “I’m crazy in love with you, too”.’

Her mouth fell open again. ‘Are you? In love with me?’ she asked, needing to make sure her ears were working properly, and her imagination wasn’t playing tricks on her.

‘Yeah.’

‘Why?’

His eyes filled with emotion. ‘Why do I love you? How could Inotlove you, Bea? You’re real and strong, and smart and imaginative and you have a heart as big as the sky. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, waking up with you and going to sleep with you, having children with you. You’re … you’re… This is going to sound stupid, but you fill in the blanks.’

‘Ifill in the blanks?’

‘I have money, success, whatever the hell that is, and I love my job. I thought that was enough until I met you. Then I realised there were all these missing things in my life – love and acceptance and trust – and you gave them back to me.’

‘Oh.’

‘That’s all you can say?’ Gib muttered, running his hand down his face. ‘God, I need a drink.’

Bea blinked back her tears and handed him a watery smile. ‘I needyou,’ she told him softly.

His eyes narrowed, his entire focus on her. ‘Are you going to expand on that?’

She bit the inside of her lip, trying to find the right words. ‘Do you remember that first sunset we watched, the night of the cocktail party?’

He shrugged. ‘Sort of. I mean, I had my eyes on you most of the time, but I remember it was good.’

Bea smiled. ‘It was this riot of pinks and purples and golds and reds, streaky and stunning, probably the best sunset I’ve seen, and I’ve seen a lot of sunsets on this island.’ She tipped her head. ‘You don’t know where I’m going with this, do you?’