Page 54 of Breaking the Sinner

“And how’s that?”

Gen nibbled on her lip as she thought. “Like I’m something precious. Something he doesn’t want to let go of.” When Sophie didn’t look convinced, Gen added, “I told you. We have this connection. It’s powerful.”

Sophie pursed her lips, slipping onto the couch beside Gen. “Are you sure it’s not because he’s the first?”

Gen shook her head. “He said it’s never felt like that with anyone else before.”

Sophie sighed. “It’s good that you believe him. But it’s also very easy for him to lie about this. Do you understand what I mean?”

“I do. But I also know what I feel.” Gen swallowed, her throat suddenly tight. She wanted Cobra more than she could articulate. More than she could even understand. “Look at what I found.”

Gen tugged out a square of crinkled paper from the back of her book. She’d found it in the trashcan by accident; she wasn’t sure what had whispered at her to inspect it, but she had. She unfolded it, smoothing it out on top of the hard cover of her book. “Cobra drew this and then threw it away the other night.”

He’d drawnher: a jerky sketch of her sleeping on the couch. His thick, strong lines outlined her curled up figure on a half-finished couch. It was bare bones. Quick. The most beautiful thing she’d ever seen.

“Damn,” Sophie said.

Gen sighed, folding it back up. She planned to carry it around everywhere with her. Somehow, it made sense. “But whatever. It’s just experimentation with him. I mean, I’m certainly not marrying him. I could never.”

“Why’s that?”

“He’s not…” She stopped before she could say the words.Part of the communityhad been at the tip of her tongue. But what did that even mean anymore? She didn’t know if she was either. Not in the way she always had been.

“What is it?”

“He’s from the outside world,” she finally whispered. “I need to be with someone who believes in God. Someone from home.” She swallowed hard, looking up at Sophie. “Right?”

Sophie sighed, looking wearier than she’d ever seen her. “I don’t know, hon. Only if you plan on going home, I guess.”

Gen gnawed on her lip as she thought about this. Home had always felt like the ultimate destination. Where else could she go but back to her family? Her time in the real world served as experience. Born of curiosity. So why did she want to think about forever with Cobra? His world and her world—they were deeply incompatible.

“Do you ever think about going home?”

Sophie’s answer was as sharp as a knife blade. “Nope.”

“Don’t you miss everyone? It’s been two months for me, and sometimes I can barely stand not seeing them every day.”

Sophie stood suddenly and returned to the kitchen. She didn’t speak for so long that Gen thought she’d upset her with the question.

“I do miss everyone. More than I fucking want to admit.” Sophie sighed tersely. “But how they live…it’s not right.”

“But they’re family.”

“And what does that mean?”

The question made Gen’s mouth dry. “I don’t know what you’re asking me.” Still, it felt like a gut punch.

“What does it matter if they’re family?” Sophie came back over to the couch, looking down at Gen. There was a fire in her eyes she didn’t normally see. “Does that mean we have to accept the abuse?”

“I don’t know if I’d call it abuse—”

“Fine. Maybe you’re not there yet.” Sophie waved a hand between them, like clearing the air. “But the thing is, I’m ten years out. My perspective is…different. And I’m never fucking going back.”

“Not even to see your mom?”

Sophie’s nostrils flared, but her stern expression didn’t waver. “Not even to see my mom.”

The silence stretched so wide between them Gen’s ears started to ring. Finally, she asked, “What happened?”

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