Page 100 of Breaking the Sinner

She tilted back her head, and laughed as the sun warmed her cheek.

Chapter 39

Gen’s journey back—walked three miles into town, hitchhiked to Fresno, bussed it back to Los Angeles, then hailed a very questionable cab back to her apartment—became the chisel to her lump of unformed clay.

She’d thought of enough metaphors to describe her life in that three mile journey in the autumnal afternoon. And more than that, she knew her next step.

Her favorite moment of that solo walk was one she had relived several times. Hands in the air while the white alders loomed overhead, golden-hued sunlight breaking through the yellowed leaves, screaming, “I’m getting my fucking passport!” Birds had flown away at the sound of her voice. She’d taken that as agreement.

Because she was going to Europe.

Turned out that emotional devastation could really prime the pump. Cobra hadn’t returned a single call or text. His phone was so off that she wondered if maybe he’d run it over on his way back to LA. Part of her wanted to track him down again.

But after he’d walked out on her—not only dumping, but abandoning her—even Gen knew that he held the cards. Despite every last inch of her body vibrating with a bone-deepneedto see him, she wouldn’t crack.

The days after Thanksgiving became a productive blur. Back home with Sophie, as Gen recounted the epic-failure saga of her trip back home over beer and sushi, Gen filled out an expedited application for a passport.

And then began the hunt for discount airlines.

Thank God she had extra days off for the holiday, because there was almost too much to learn about traveling abroad and going through airport security and how much bags should weigh and absolutely whatnot to pack.That didn’t even touch individual destinations—what countries were safer for single women, what countries had indecipherable metro systems, which language sounded the sexiest, which airports were the best for overnighting in to avoid using a hotel.

By Sunday morning, Gen had her itinerary planned—Greece, Spain, England—which meant that on Monday, she would break the news to Travis at work. She’d phase out of Holt Body Fitness as soon as possible. She’d gotten a few months’ work experience, which had been the plan.

Sophie made pancakes for lunch on Sunday, which was part celebration of Big Life Decisions and part random craving on her part.

“I haven’t had pancakes in like, six years,” Sophie declared, cutting off a slice of butter on top of a still-steaming pancake. “I hope I’m not pregnant.”

The offhand comment made Gen sit up. In the hullabaloo of planning this spontaneous European trip, she’d forgotten all about that life-changingly good unprotected sex in the back seat of Cobra’s car.

“Oh God. Why are you looking at me like that?” Sophie asked.

“I forgot to tell you.”

“You’re pregnant?”

Gen laughed a little. “No. But Icouldbe, I suppose. I had unprotected sex.”

Sophie grimaced. “Girl, I was just kidding about me being pregnant. Are you okay? Did the condom break?”

“I wanted it,” she said, trying not to get caught up in breathy recollections of the handful of times they’d made love. Because that’s what it was—every time with Cobra had been made of love. A sacred union that far surpassed what she’d ever imagined for any future spouse.

Maybe she’d found what her father wanted for her after all…in the last possible place he’d imagined.

Sophie nodded, tucking some jet-black hair behind her ear. “How was it?”

Gen huffed. “Too amazing. I can’t even talk about it.”

“I had unprotected sex once with this guy I dated. But the sex sucked overall.”

“Listen to us,” Gen said. “Our parents would probably pass away from shock if they heard us talking right now.”

“I’m surprised that you saying ‘shit show’ at the Thanksgiving table didn’t off them right then and there.”

Gen smirked. “So not using a condom can actually be bad?”

Sophie’s eyes went wide for a moment. “Oh, yeah. Not all sex is blessed by the angels like with you and Cobra.Trust me.”

Gen sighed, shaking her head. Cobra had walked out of her parents’ house three days ago, but it might have been three years. “It was beautiful and so meaningful.”

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