Page 68 of The Order: Rise of the New Empire

"Don't talk," I sob, trying to hold it together at the mention of our daughter. "Please, don't fucking talk, Xavier. You just make things harder-"

Hearing the window to the back barely slide open, the guards silently try to listen to what is happening, ready to report back to Elyon with any news they may find.

“You think you can come back here, and things will go back to the way they are?" I question, raising my voice for the men, running my hands down Xavier's front, gently kissing his temples. "You will willingly follow mine and my father's cause, creating a divine world, void of the tainted Marked we so willingly supported," I snap, smiling once his mouth curls into a soft grin. Kissing his forehead, I continue on. "You and Fallan will serve the house of Morgan, fighting for a larger cause," moving his head to my chest, I let him listen to my heart, gently kissing the top of his head as my hands work through his hair. “If you want our gracious hospitality, you will earn it. Unlike Fallan, you hold value in your strengths-"

Closing the small window, they are pleased with what they have heard, my lungs releasing a shaky breath.

Holding him close, I am unable to hide the flood of tears leaking from my eyes, the only thing I need is the man's arms wrapped around me.

"Forest, look at me," Xavier whispers, trying to get me to focus.

Shaking my head, I bite my cheek, trying to force myself to keep him like this.

"Please, angel," he whispers. "Look at me."

Leaning back, I wrap my arms around his neck, watching the tears wet both of our clothing. Filling with a look of pain, his eyes grow watery, his head slowly shaking.

"I can't wipe your tears away, beautiful-"

"I know," I sob. "It has to be that way for now," I whisper, pressing my forehead to his, doing my best to keep it all together. "So many things are out of my control, Xavier."

"What is the larger plan here, Forest?" he whispers, filled to the brim with the fear I too carry.

"I had to gain his trust to keep you both safe," I sob. "Now, I have to find a way to keep him down-"

"I won't let you-"

"Not with my sacrifice, Xavier," I sob, trying to get him to focus. "He needs to be locked away, hidden for no one to find, fed the smallest rations and blood until I can find a way to unlink me and our girl," I cry. "I would never hurt you, Xavier. I would never willingly leave you-"

"I know that," he whispers. "I know that now."

Rolling my fingers over his cheeks, I kiss his forehead.

"So long as you follow my rules, everything will be okay," I reassure, regrettably breaking one of his binds.

Grabbing his hand before he can react, I settle it beneath my cloak, allowing him to feel the small bump, the warmth in my stomach growing.

"It will be okay for both of you."

Smiling the largest I have ever seen; he looks up at me in admiration.

"I feel her," he smiles. "I feel her strength."

"Just like her dad," I smile, his hand moving away from my stomach, cupping my face, my head leaning into the touch with closed eyes.

"And her mom," he whispers, his thumb rolling over my cheek wiping away what tears he can.

Biting my lip, I give the man one last kiss, letting it linger.

Winnowing, I give us space, taking my seat back across from him, his face flustered at my sudden absence.

"We're going back to New Haven," I warn, throwing on my cold front once more.

It's the only way to hold it together.

"That is where the real work begins."

Chapter twenty-one

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