“Theyknow my reputation,” Vicari said as he pointed at his men. “‘Big Dick Vicari.’ Isn’t that right?”
“That’s what they say, boss,” Shotgun said with a grin.
Um…
Okay…
“Caused a lot of problems for my old man,” Vicari said cheerfully. “Angry fathers trying to kill me. We had to make a lot of problems go away.”
I was assuming that by ‘go away,’ he didn’t mean bribing them.
Jesus fucking Christ…
“Hell, I probably got a lot of bastard kids all over Sicily. Never wore a condom, not once, and Ineverpulled out.”
The guys in the front laughed even harder.
I was gettingintenselyuncomfortable with this conversation.
“Of course, all that stopped when I met my sainted Matelda,” Vicari said, switching on a dime from happy to somber. “God rest her soul.”
The driver and shotgun guy both immediately stopped laughing, too.
Shotgun actually crossed himself.
Then Vicari turned to me. “So when a pretty boy with the face of a movie star tells me he hasn’t got any girls back home, I know he’s either lying or he’s afinocchio.”
Finocchiowas the word for ‘fennel’ – but also a slur for being gay.
“So which is it?” Vicari asked coldly.
“…therewasa girl,” I said back just as coldly. “But not anymore.”
“Good,” he said as he held his hand for my phone. “Let’s keep it that way.”
“I need it to talk to my family!”
“You can have it back whenever you want to call them.” When I didn’t move, Vicari growled, “It wasn’t a request.”
I wondered what would happen if I just said ‘no’ –
But I noticed that Shotgun was watching the rearview mirror to see what I would do. The driver glanced into the mirror every few seconds for the same reason.
Then Vicari gave me that chilling smile I’d seen earlier – the one where the smile didn’t reach his eyes.
“I’d hate to have to treat my new son-in-law like myconsigliere.”
A shiver ran down my spine…
And I finally handed my phone over in angry silence.
Vicari slipped it inside his suit jacket. “And just so we’re clear, you willnotbe fucking other women. You’ll be faithful to my daughter your entire marriage, or I’m gonna have something to fuckin’ say about it.Capiche?”
“Capito,”I muttered.
Understood.
What else could I say?