Page 109 of Roberto

By that point, my check from the casino had cleared. On my next visit, I walked out not only with another 100,000 Hong Kong dollars but also my Rolex.

I didn’t need the Rolex…

But Ididneed the money to feed my addiction.

Mei-ling became my sole focus. Everything else went out the window.

I stopped calling Lau and couldn’t have cared less when he didn’t contact me.

If hehadcalled me, I would have been despondent – because that would have meant I’d have to leave Hong Kong.

The one thing that ate at my conscience was Niccolo. He texted me every day –What’s happening?– and I texted back guiltily,Working on it.

It was true… although only by the thinnest of margins.

Therealtruth was that I was a man obsessed.

Nothing – not even my duty to my family – could stand in the way of my insanity.

I felt ashamed of that…

And yet I still kept chasing her, like a junkie chasing his next high.

Every glimpse of her was another hit.

Every time I saw her face, I craved more.

I imagined her naked body writhing beneath me…

The sight of my cock sliding inside her pussy…

The way she spoke Cantonese in the throes of passion…

The sounds she made when she came.

Every memory I recalled only made the addiction worse.

There wasnothingI wouldn’t do to get her back…

Nothing.

On the fifth night of surveillance, I got bored and told my driver to stay put while I got out of the car.

I began walking the streets outside De Sade, looking for a way to get inside without being seen.

The underground parking lot had a metal lattice gate that went up and down as cars entered and exited. Not only that, it was monitored 24/7 by cameras, sothatwouldn’t work.

I couldn’t get in through the lobby. I was certain the men guarding the elevator would turn me away.

Even if Icouldget by them and go up to the 10thfloor, I would encounter the red door, which could only be unlocked from the inside.

I returned to the car in defeat.

I considered whether I should just call Han and tell him I wanted to visit De Sade.

At leastthatway, I was fairly sure I could bully my way in.

It would be less than optimal – I knew Mei-ling would be enraged – but it was better than all this useless waiting.