Page 72 of Mr. Broody

I don’t want to look at him. It’ll only make this more difficult.

“Please.”

I blow out a breath and inhale another big one, then circle back and cross my legs, not meeting his eyes.

“Look at me.”

“You’re being really bossy,” I grumble.

“No. We’re not doing that. We’re not covering this up with humor.”

I lift my gaze and find him on his knees, resting back on his heels. The moonlight only makes him more beautiful, and for a moment, I see all of my Henrys. The shy little boy I guided around as my playmate, speaking for him the majority of the time. The teenager who found himself and took my hand, guiding me through house parties, proudly displaying me as his girlfriend. The new adult in college who gained all the confidence in himself and his decisions, the one who opened his heart and let me become the person he loved the most. Now, he’s all man. A capable man who holds an air that makes other men jealous. A man who isn’t mine.

“I came here tonight because I made the wrong decision eight years ago. I thought you couldn’t find yourself with me in your life. That you had to travel far and wide in order to do it. I’m pretty sure I was wrong because of course you feel that way about your camera. How could you not? It replaced me. You found a love for photography when I wasn’t standing by your side.”

God, he can’t be right, can he?

“Ever since you came back into town, I’ve been racking my brain over how to keep you here. What I could say to get you to stay in Chicago. Stay with me. While at the same time telling myself I couldn’t be that selfish, nor could I try again. I thought I had to be the shield for Bodhi and sacrifice myself for him.”

“That makes sense,” I say, really wanting to get out of here.

“It’s bullshit, Jade. It’s all bullshit.”

I shake my head, and my gaze lands on him again. “But?—”

“I was a shit boyfriend to let you go and tell you that you couldn’t find yourself when we were together. What the hell? I should’ve made sure you did, not pushed you away to do it on your own. I should have made sure I had time in my schedule to show you how amazing you are. To go on those trips during my off season. To pick up the snacks and drive you somewhere to see an amazing sunset. To stand behind you as you pointed that camera and told you how brilliant you are.”

I shake my head. “I’m not sure it would’ve worked. I think I was never going to put myself out there because I was scared.” I don’t want to get into all the hangups my mom decided to point out.

He inches forward, taking my hands. “Date me.”

I blink several times before my brain can make sense of his words. “What?”

“Date me, Jade. I know we have a lot of shit behind us, but I came here tonight to ask you to date me.”

“You did?” My voice cracks, and my heart just about beats out of my chest. “What if I was leaving again?”

He stares at me for a moment, and I can’t read him. “I don’t know. I just knew I couldn’t sit back and let you walk out of my life again without trying. I want to discover you again. Find out the woman you are today.”

“But Bodhi…”

He nods. “Yeah, that’s a hard one for me, but what I realized today is that he’s already attached. No matter what happens, he already really likes you, and it got me thinking about what kind of dad I want to be for him. Who am I if I don’t show him to go after what he wants? That sure, it might not end up how you want it to, but you don’t know unless you put yourself out there and try. He needs to know that it’s okay to be scared, but you fight through that, hoping like hell it turns out the way you want.”

Henry is such a good man. That hasn’t changed in all the years we’ve been apart. It just makes me love him more.

“So… just date?”

He chuckles, and I close my eyes briefly, listening to the sound. “Yeah. You know, dinners and movies and walks. No pressure.”

Is he kidding? No pressure? How can we go from being everything to each other to nothing to dating? How quickly will it escalate to something more, and he’ll be my entire world again?

“Give me a second.” I swing my legs around and go down the slide.

I hear him follow me. As I stand, he comes up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist. I lean back into him, turning my head so my forehead hits his chin, breathing him in. Being here with him, in his arms again, feels right. I can’t deny it.

“Okay, one date. Give me one date,” he whispers.

I laugh at Henry being so eager. Such a drastic difference from all those years ago when he first told me he liked me.

---