Page 97 of Mr. Broody

“Jade?” he finishes.

I release the breath I was holding. Not because I wouldn’t love for him to call her Mom one day, but I don’t want to scare her off, not when I’m finally making progress.

“Sure. But in the classroom, can you try to remember Miss Jade? It’s a school thing.” She shrugs.

He giggles. “Yeah, I can.”

“Great.”

She shows him a few more times, and he eventually becomes accustomed to the weight of the camera. Once he’s comfortable with it, she allows him to walk around near us with the camera.

“What should I take pictures of?” he asks.

“Anything you love. Any moment you want to capture. Anything you find interesting,” she says. “It’s all about your eye. What you see.”

She leans back on her hands, and I do the same, both of us watching him.

“He’s so great, Henry. I know I’ve told you before, but you’ve done a great job.”

The fact that she thinks I’m a good dad only makes my heart want to leap into her hands and say own me.

“Thanks. He’s kind of easy, but sometimes I fear I’ve made him a tad too responsible. My biggest fear is that he’s not enjoying his childhood as much as he should be. That he’s always worried about one thing or the other. I’d like him to be more carefree.”

“Nah. He’s perfect just how he is.”

We watch as Bodhi takes pictures of the sky, the trees, of the bicyclists soaring by. Nothing beats seeing a kid exploring the world around them with such excitement.

“Can I ask you something?” There’s a hint of discomfort in her tone.

“Anything.”

“Does he know? Or even understand about the adoption.”

“The first few months were hard. He had a lot of nightmares. Still has some, but I’m not sure if they’re about things he saw or experienced as much as just the nightmares all kids get. Maybe it’s because my childhood blew up so young, but I didn’t want to keep secrets from him. Plus, I haven’t had him since birth. Eventually, he’d ask me why we don’t really look alike, why there are no pictures of him as an infant. I want him to know he can always trust me. But I struggled with the right decision for a long time.”

“I’m sure you handled it great.”

I bring my knees up and wrap my arms around them, smiling at Bodhi getting really close to a bush to take a picture. “Nothing challenges your self-confidence more than raising a child. I’ve never second-guessed myself so much in my entire life.”

She knocks her shoulder to mine. “We both turned out okay.”

She’s right. We survived, and we both went through devastating things in our childhood. Her parents’ divorce and the fact her dad never put her first. And obviously, my parents’ deaths.

“I just wish I could give him more family. That’s why as much as Reed tells me to move out of The Nest, I just can’t. The guys are like uncles to him, and Kyleigh’s like a…”

“A mom?” she asks, and I hear the crack in her voice.

“Well, more like an aunt. They’re close, but she’s not a mother to him.” I glance over and see her eyes are only on Bodhi. “He wants a mom, though. Does that scare you?”

She doesn’t turn to look at me. “It should.” A little giggle bubbles out of her. “I mean, I’m a mess. I’m living with my parents, and I have no idea what my future looks like, but… it doesn’t. I’m not sure I’d be the kind of mom he’d want though.”

“Hey,” I say, placing my finger on her chin and turning her to look at me. “You’re not a mess. You’re starting fresh, and that’s okay. That takes courage. And his only expectation of a mother is for her to love him. That’s all he wants. And you’ve always been the best at loving someone.”

She turns away from me and blinks quickly a few times, not responding.

“Jade!” Bodhi shouts and runs over.

“Be careful,” she says.

---