Page 111 of Crown of Tides and Fury

Persi laughed.“The perfect poem for mid-life crises.”

“You have no idea.” Felicity stumbled down the steps to join us women on the patio couches. “Maybe Ishouldlet Wickham have my power. Do you know what it’s like? Wanting so badly to renovate an old building with half your soul while the other half is dying to bring it down?”

Everly laughed. “Urban and I felt that way about our last two houses.”

“Not quite the same. Did you ever wake up in the middle of the night, certain you’ll lose your mind if you don’t tear something down, brick by brick, with your bare hands? Or have some empty space haunt you, like a ghost, pleading with you to define it? To give it life?”

Everly shared a knowing look with Urban, then showed Felicity some pity. “I can’t imagine.”

“Do you know how many warehouses I have?”

I spoke up. “I know you have at least one the size of a giant plane hangar.”

Felicity snorted. “I have four that size. One of them, no one knows about. It has a section the capacity of your study here, with nothing in it but doorknobs! I can’t throw one away to save my life. I can’t throw away anything made by hand. Old doors, bedsteads. Candelabras. Do you know how many people still use candelabras? Zero.”

“You’re saying you have a hoarding problem?”

“I’m saying I have an art problem. I see everything as a work of art, no matter how badly it’s been maintained. Sometimes…” She moved closer to Everly until their shoulders touched. “Sometimes, I go to the wrecking yard to watch them smash cars into mangled piles of metal, to convince myself that it’s all right to let things go, to let them be changed into new art. But then, ho, then I start thinking that I’m the one who needs to change it!”

Tears flooded her eyes, and when she blinked, they streamed straight down her cheeks and left dark gray drops on her borrowed sweatshirt.

“The worst word in the English language?”

We waited with bated breath.

“Re-purposed.”

Ivy stood up and gently took the woman’s glass from her hand. “Let’s take a nice long nap, shall we? And you can tell us about your warehouses tomorrow, over breakfast.”

Felicity went along willingly, blinkingly.

None of us laughed.

I turned to Rinky. “What about you? You considering giving up your power?”

“Fertility? You bet. It’s like having a symphony at my fingertips, that plays every time I make a move. I can stick my hands in the soil and make flowers bloom on the other side of town, did you know that? I’ve made miles of farmland thrive. I’ve brought entire countrysides back to healthy production. But I can’t change people. I can’t change the power dynamic. Gandhi might have done it, while he was alive, but as soon as he was gone?” She sighed. “And I’m no Gandhi. That’s where the madness comes in. It’s always the people. Miracles are just a way to tease the have-nots. It’s better not to tease.” Then she hiccupped.

“Okay.” I reached for her glass. “No more champagne for you.”

I ignored the little angel jumping up and down on my shoulder, demanding I acknowledge that I wasn’t the only one being torn in two directions. Then it occurred to me this epiphany might be the reason Wickham asked me to stay…

I noticed Everly’s drink was clear and asked her if she was drinking from a different bottle. She shushed me and leaned closer. “It’s soda.”

“Not a fan of champagne?”

She bit her lips together and shook her head, then laid her hand on her abdomen for a second before pulling it away.

She’s pregnant?

I searched her eyes and she nodded, then held her glass to her cheek so no one could read her lips. “No one can know. Especially not Urban.”

I could barely contain myself and got to my feet, turning toward the orchard so no one could see my face. I felt like… I felt like…like a big ol’ softball suddenly hit out of the park, flying through the sky with nothing to stop me. I felt like…likeIwas the one who was about to have a baby, that my motherless fate had just been reversed. It was ridiculous to react that way, but I couldn’t explain my utter joy any better.

I fought to control my face and my breathing and forced my butt back onto the couch between Rinky and Everly. My right arm tingled where it bumped up against our new friend, and those tingles shot through my veins toward my heart before they faded.

I laughed when I realized where my ridiculous thought had come from--for all intents and purposes, I’d been sitting beside the Goddess of Fertility herself.

I reached for Everly’s hand and gave it a hard squeeze so she’d know just how incredibly happy I was for her. Then my heart sank when I realized I wouldn’t be around to meet this child…

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